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Tuesday, May 30, 2017

Ariana to share more love to fight terrorism

Doughnut-licking mega pop star Ariana Grande has decided to hold a benefit concert for Manchester attack victims on Sunday.

The American flag and American citizen hater will return to the city of Manchester to raise money for the victims of last week's deadly bombing that killed 22 people and injured over 100 at her show titled "Dangerous Woman."

Now she's calling the new show "One Love Manchester." It will be held at Old Trafford cricket ground where she will be joined by such big names as: Horatio Dellarackatackapoulisianoppoulus, Poindexter Spinnackerloonerie, and Jealiandopadred Sciantiallini.

Just kidding. 

The big names are actually Coldplay, Katy "Just Hug it Out" Perry, Justin Bieber and Pharrell Williams.

All proceeds will be slated to go to an emergency fund set up by the city of Manchester and the British Red Cross. Hopefully, the latter group will not be handing out any doughnuts at the concert.

In a statement likely written by a ghost writer, she said to her fans that "we won't let hate win" and "we won't let this divide us."

Perhaps she doesn't understand why suicide bombers blow themselves up to kill others--it has nothing to do with hate, and everything to do with wanting to get to heaven in their loser minds.

And what does it mean 'divide us'? If anything, terror brings innocent people closer together as they feel a greater sense of strength by doing so. 

Grande apologized for any pain and offered to "extend my hand and heart and everything I possibly can give to you and yours," bringing into question as to whether she would have said the same thing had the audience been American rather than British.

"Our response to this violence must be to come closer together, to help each other, to love more, to sing louder and to live more kindly and generously than we did before," the naive singer wrote.

Yes, they blow themselves up to get into heaven while we sing "Blowin' in the Wind," to show each other love. 

That'll show 'em.

If only we could arm our military with guitars.