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Monday, April 17, 2017

Monkey see, monkey do students say statue will cause them to commit suicide

(Photo: Heat Street)
Pea-brained students at a British university have loudly protested over a statue of a person standing on the edge of the library roof in a pose that appears it looks like it's about to jump off the building. Some students say it's a "poor choice" because it promotes their sheepish stupidity and might cause them to do what the statue apparently wants to do.

Young schmucklets at the University of East Anglia (UEA) don't think they can keep from leaping to their horrible deaths after looking at the statue by popular artist Antony Gormley. 

The "Gormster" is best known for his Angel of the North statue, obviously having nothing at all to do with Kim Jong Un. The new statue entitled: "Jump, You Chicken, Jump!" [not really] has convinced the more dim-witted amongst the students that the statue is a real dude. 

A university spokesman defended the work of art saying the statue is "thought-provoking and offer both spectacle and surprise," and if a student jumps off the building because the statue told him to, well nothing would have saved the idiot in the first place.

"Is this some sort of sick joke?" one fragile snowflake posted on Instagram, whose level of Thanatos was shooting off the scales.

Harry T. Dyer tweeted: "Love his work, & it fits with our other sculptures, but I think it's potentially a poor choice, especially at dissertation crunch time . . . " [when suicidal students clearly cannot deal with life].

A UEA grad student, Kimberly Davies told the paper: "It's a bit tactless to put a statue on top of a building filled with people on edge during exam season. Sombreros are a no-no, but making passers-by think someone's about to commit suicide is art--I'm out."

Davies probably loved the sculpture of "Piss Christ."

Maybe it's a bad idea, but seriously--if it can cause students to off themselves, they should be home under the bed, not in a university setting.

This generation is clearly messed up.

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