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Friday, September 9, 2016

Trump thinks Kim's nuke test was a blast

Seoul, South Korea -- Well, it's official, North Korea conducted a nuclear warhead test Friday that will ostensibly allow them to finally build, "at will" a load of stronger, smaller and lighter nuclear weapons that will reach the shores of the USA.

GOP presidential candidate Donald Trump said of North Korea's dictator Kim Jong Un, that he wishes President Obama had the same persistence and drive that Kim has. Trump also likes the way he commands his army whereas Obama cuts its size. 

He just isn't "cool" with a the name 'Kim' as it's usually a girl's name, he said.

South Korea's president Park Geun-hye, called the detonation  an act of "fanatic recklessness" as it was the largest explosive-yield to date. 

Trump said that if he is elected president, he will have nuclear tests that will make your head spin. "North Korea's got nothing on the US. We will win the race to biggest bomb on the planet and my friend Vladimir Putin will pay for it."

The North is bragging about this game-changer nuke test as it defies tough sanctions put on the peasants of the dictator nation, as well as the diplomatic pressure to curb its nuclear ambitions.

"I love ambition," Trump said. "You gotta hand it to Kim, he's ambitions. He's very ambitious. I wish Obama or Hillary Clinton were as ambitious as Kim Jong Un; am I saying it right?"

Along with this latest nuclear test comes new and serious concerns in many parts of the world that this crazy corpulent dictator has taken a giant step toward its nuclear goal of developing a nuclear-armed missile that could snuff out the lives of hordes of California progressives and full-blown leftists. 

Since North Korea's blatant disregard for international law, Hillary Clinton has assured her leftist followers that she's got U.S. national security under control.

"I TAKE NATIONAL SECURITY VERY SERIOUSLY!" Hillary screamed. 

When asked about how seriously she took national security when, in fact, she used a private email server that had about as much security as a rabbi at the hajj, she brushed the reporter off with a sweeping hand gesture, gave out donuts to the press and then went into a coughing jag.

A few hours after South Korea noted unusual seismic activity along the North's northeastern nuclear testing site, Pyongyang's state-run media said that a test had "finally examined and confirmed the structure and specific features of movement of a nuclear warhead that has been standardized to be able to be mounted on strategic ballistic rockets."

Dennis Rodman said that he thinks with all the fuss we're making about Kim's latest adventure, that he's getting a "bad rep."

"Guess what. Guess what," the former NBA all star said. "Kim's a good guy. When are you all going to see that? He's good."

Kim secretly hopes that Trump will be our next president, according to a Russian-hacked Clinton email when she was secretary of state.

Trump responded to this latest revelation: "Well, at least one world leader has good taste, if you don't count Putin, who also likes me a lot.  Okay, make that two world leaders who like me and respect me.

"I may not agree with their policies, but they get things done and are very very strong leaders, very strong leaders. And you have to give them credit for what they have done for their countries. Two. Very very strong. So strong."

Park's office said she and President Obama spoke on Friday about the test as they attended a regional summit in Laos. She said that South Korea will do everything possible to pressure the North. 

Mr. Obama warned that she shouldn't be too harsh on them and instead suggested she go after them on Twitter, as Michelle often does.