Religious Job Openings in Saudi Arabia

Just when it seems like the world job markets are drying up, Saudi Arabia announces that they have 8 "wet work" positions available. These wonderful opportunities became necessary after more sharia judges have been put on the government payroll and were posted by the Saudi civil service ministry.

I can see the public advertisement now:

"Wanted: A go-getter-beheader and amputation technician. No experience necessary. Must have own tools; we pay sharpening expense.

"This is a " hands on, hands off " position for the right person. Work directly with the public in the public square. Have your own cleanup crew.

"If you enjoy doing Allah's work and are comfortable being the center of attention, this is the job for you.

" Our highly skilled mosqueteers will train you to perform minor amputations (e.g., removal of fingers that found their way to the proverbial cookie jar), more serious amputations (e.g., hand removal for stealing from other Muslims), and Islam's signature beheadings (e.g., for accidentally dropping a Qur'an, blogging or tweeting negatively about the Prophet, peace be upon Him).

"Ask about our "Stoning" positions.

"Salary commensurate with bloodlust."

The job application form refers to the position as "religious functionaries." The pay sucks, but it's good for your resume if you're into that kind of "religious"  activity. A beheading can be earned for murder, apostasy (leaving Islam--kind of sounds like the Mafia), armed  robbery and drug trafficking.

Last year there were 88 beheadings, according to Human Rights Watch. So far this year there have been 85 beheadings and it looks like they're going for the record. 

It's disgusting. It's Sharia, and It's Islam.

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