Iran accuses Israeli military of using the occult--can I get an LOL

Yeoh, buckle up, because Iran’s dropping some wild claims about Israel’s playbook in their 12-day war.

Abdollah Ganji, ex-boss of the IRGC’s mouthpiece Javan, took to X to spill the tea to his 150,000 crazed followers. The guy is out here saying Israel was straight-up summoning “the occult and supernatural spirits” to win the fight. Try not to laugh, you read that right: black magic and ghostbusters-level shenanigans. Iran International caught this gem on Friday, and it’s pure chaos, albeit of the laughable kind.

Ganji’s post on Wednesday was like something out of a sci-fi flick or just a bad joke. 

He said, “After the recent war, a few sheets of paper were found on the streets of Tehran containing talismans with Jewish symbols.” 

Say what? He’s doubling down, claiming that back in the Gaza war’s first year, word got out about Netanyahu chilling with "occult specialists." Like, Bibi’s out here holding séances or something? Ganji [not to be confused with ganja] even dragged the Supreme Leader into it, quoting him saying, "Hostile countries and Western and Hebrew intelligence services use occult sciences and jinn entities for espionage." 

Grok 3 concept of a jinn

Jinn. Freaking jinn. You know, those shape-shifting, superpower-wielding spirits from folklore? Apparently, they’re Mossad’s new interns.

Mossad’s Farsi X account wasn’t having it. They clapped back on Tuesday with a savage, "Using drugs and talking to the jinn are not desirable traits for someone leading a country." Oof, shots fired. Then Waleed Gadban, Israel’s political advisor at the UN, jumped in, reposting Mossad’s burn with a cheeky, “Jinn, jinn are everywhere,” complete with a ghost emoji. I'm almost peeing.

So, Iran’s out here accusing Israel of weaponizing the supernatural, while Israel’s like, "Bruh, lay off the hookah." This is peak 2025 geopolitics, and I’m just here for the popcorn, and maybe a talisman or two.

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