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Tuesday, May 9, 2017

Corpulent Kim gets his blubber tied in a knot

(Photo: Fox News)
Corpulent Kim Jong Un, the dictator of North Korea, has a propaganda chief who may be the next Stephen Colbert, only he's funnier than Colbert has ever been.

The latest comedy sketch from Pyongyang's propaganda goon (or goonette) came after Sen. Cory Gardner (R-CO) said that Kim Jong Un was a "whack job."

The repartee came quickly from the Hermit Nation's Ministry of Guffaws:

"It is a serious provocation that Gardner, like a psychopath, dare to bear the evil that dares our highest dignity," the statement read, according to a translation. "It is America's misfortune that a man mixed in with human dirt like Gardner, who has lost basic judgment and body hair, could only spell misfortune for the United States."

Garner has a full head of red hair, so perhaps the state-run Korea Central News Agency (KCNA) has looked elsewhere on the Senator's body, perhaps to the south, but they apparently don't know what they're talking about.

KCNA also went after former President Obama in 2014, calling him a "clown," a "dirty fellow," and a "juvenile delinquent." The racist organization said that Obama "does not even have the basic appearances of a human being."

As racist a remark as Colbert's was vile about Trump.

Regarding Hillary Clinton, KCNA described her in 2009 as "by no means intelligent," and a "funny lady." 

Sadly, they got the first part right and the second part wrong. 

But they went on to say that "Sometimes she looks like a primary schoolgirl and sometimes a pensioner going shopping." [I don't believe you can get a pension in North Korea.]

The North Korean propaganda machine also went after former President George W. Bush calling him a "hooligan" who looked like "a chicken soaked in the rain." 

VP Dick Chaney was "mentally deranged" and a "most cruel monster and blood-thirsty beast."

They aren't even vile enough to write for Colbert.


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