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Tuesday, December 13, 2016

216 virgins "standing by"

A U.S.-led coalition drone strike in Raqqa, Syria, destroyed the hopes and dreams of three Islamic State jihadists this month, two of whom helped plan the November 2015 terror attacks in Paris, the Pentagon announced on Tuesday.

The third turd killed on December 4th was part of a botched suicide attack plot that targeted Europe last year. A Belgium court convicted him in absentia, meaning he lost his voting rights and may not have been eligible for healthcare benefits, but a more "stringent" punishment was meted out by the drone.

There are 216 brown-eyed virgins in Paradise awaiting further duties.

Pentagon Press Secretary Peter Cook told reporters "The three were working together to plot and facilitate attacks against Western targets at the time of the strike." He said the fighters were part of a terror network led by Boubaker Al-Hakim, who was killed last month in a coalition airstrike.

Over the past two years, the coalition killed 50 thousand ISIS scumcrumpets, according to a military official.

The dead Paris attack planners were Salah Gourmat and Sammy Djedou. The third jihadist was Walid Hamman.