Friday, February 26, 2016

Breaking: your face if you don't vote for Trump

Fort Worth, Texas -- New Jersey Governor Chris Christie will be fighting for Donald Trump for the GOP presidential nomination. This came in a press conference this morning in which Donald Trump and his hair spent over 30 minutes of free air time to reintroduce Christie to his fans.

Christie is Trump's biggest endorsement in more ways than one, and said that "We don't need any more of these Washington D.C.  acts. We don't need Washington politicians to come in and fix it."

The crowd cheered wildly, but not as wildly as some woman at last night's debate who may have actually gone berserk as she cheered every sling and arrow hurled by Trump at both Rubio and Cruz.

Christie claimed that no other candidate is better prepared to provide us with strong leadership here and abroad, and if anyone had a problem with that, let him show his face now.

"I can guarantee you that the one person that Bill and Hillary don't want to see on that stage in November is Donald Trump, which was quickly countered on Twitter by Bill who tweeted: "I sure don't have a problem seeing Melania on stage or back stage."

Melania Trump, nee Knavs, as you probably realize, is Trump's third wife and former model who was born in Slovania (formerly Yugoslavia) and married the Donald in 2005. I have included a photo of her for your perusal.

Christie's endorsement comes the day after the heated GOP debate on CNN in which Marco Rubio entered political puberty and grew a set. The debate moderators were unable to control the debate, but at least Candy Crowley didn't screw things up for any of the GOP candidates like she did with Romney.

Rubio accused Donald of being a loser. He said that if Trump had not inherited $200 million from daddy, he'd be selling watches in Manhattan.

As it is, Trump is selling ties in Manhattan that are made in China, and he is selling buildings in Manhattan to people in China. Very confusing, folks.

Trump repeatedly said that Rubio repeats himself and Marco pointed out that Trump had just done the same "five times in the last minute."

Is it possible that Trump is scared after getting double-teamed by Rubio and Cruz? We shall see, but meantime, with Christie on the Trump stump, both Cruz and Rubio would do well to hire food tasters.


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