Tuesday, January 12, 2016

Breaking: 10 U.S. sailors being held by Iran

Nine males and one female U.S. sailor are being "detained on Tuesday by Iranian Revolutionary Guard forces," according to FoxNews.com. The report they put out said that their boats apparently became disabled in the Persian Gulf, but this has not been confirmed.

The timing is perfect for the Iranians--President Obama is about to give his State of the Union speech outlining the wonderful job he has done over the past 7 years, but it looks like Iran has thrown in a monkey wrench to the gears of balderdash.

The original report said that the sailors would be released "promptly," but now Iran is saying that they want to wait until morning--they don't want to release them in the middle of the night. This must be in accordance with the Revolutionary Guard Union regulations stating that no Guard is to work beyond 5:00 p.m.

No surprise, Obama isn't arguing this detail and will wait. Kerry may or may not believe Iran, but he doesn't actually count.

This latest insult of our power by Iran occurred near Farsi Island in the Gulf. The Pentagon reports that one of the two small craft had mechanical trouble, which caused one or both to run aground. Iran then picked up the sailors and brought them to the island but their whereabouts is not known at this time.

The boats were moving between Bahrain and Kuwait when the trouble occurred and contact was lost with the crews.

Now is John Kerry's chance to shine. [LMAO]

Obama pom-pom girl, Jen Psaki, told reporters that the president will not be addressing this latest crisis because, she likely believes, it isn't a big deal like gun-control and stuff. The president will also not be addressing the other four hostages whose release he failed to negotiate for, but he will talk about his most excellent term in office.

If we're lucky, perhaps he'll shed another tear over gun control issues.

Fox News was told by a senior Obama official that Iran has assured the U.S. that the sailor's safety and well-being" is being attended to, and that they "will promptly be allowed to continue their journey," and they still want the $150 billion.


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