Thursday, September 4, 2014

Obamaspeak

Estonia, Wednesday: President Obama speaking in a voice reminiscent of his days with the Choom Gang, told the world that he aims to "degrade and destroy" ISIL (aka ISIS, IS, The Gang That Couldn't Cut Straight"). He implied the way to do that is by making them "more manageable." 

Most people on Capitol Hill scratched their collective head but Joe Biden went full-bore against ISIS when he spoke in New Hampshire, when he said: "When people harm Americans, we don't retreat. We don't forget. We take care of those who are grieving and when that's finished, they should know, we will follow them to the gates of hell until they are brought to justice. Because hell is where they will reside. Hell is where they will reside." 

Just don't let them go to Syria because I'm not so sure if we'll follow them there. 

Lawmakers on Capitol Hill urged the White House and Pentagon to get tough with ISIS, also known as the Islamic State (which is giving the morons too much credit) or ISIL, as president Obama likes to refer to those folks. The calls got louder after the video of Steven Sotloff, the second American journalist to have his head cut off, was aired online.

Initially, Obama actually appeared to own a set of testicles, saying that he condemned the beheading as "barbaric" and "horrific," and he vowed "justice will be served." I understand justice goes well with a nice red wine and cold Benghazi.

But then Hello Kitty Obama came out and his tone became that wishy-washy, "I don't have a strategy," tone when he said that if the US is joined by an international coalition, they can "continue to shrink ISIL's sphere of influence, its effectiveness, its financing, its military capabilities to the point where it is a manageable problem."

In other words, live and let chop.

Any allies that thought we were seriously going to deal with ISIS effectively now realizes that the United States has a mollycoddle president who cares not a fiddler's fart about foreign policy because he's too busy screwing up the country he dictates over.

Senator John McCain (R-AZ) spoke on Fox News on Tuesday saying that ISIS has "got to be destroyed," and said Obama doesn't have a strategy to do that yet. (You might remember McCain was also instrumental in military budget cuts, but that's for another discussion.)

Meanwhile, Secretary of State John-Swiftboat-Kerry put away his boogie board and will be going to the Middle East to ineptly attempt to build a coalition to attack ISIS while boosting the Kurdish and Iraqi governments so that they can eventually get stronger and attack us in the future.

Obama still has not provided a strategy about ISIS in Syria. "It'll take time to roll them back," he said, in a voice devoid of a "Negro dialect," as Harry Reid liked to say. This statement confused Joe Biden who thought president Obama was referring to a "roll-back sale" at Walmart.


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