Taco Bell Introduces Authentic "Runs for the Border" Experience, CDC Confirms It Was Perhaps Too Authentic

ATLANTA, AP, Taco Bell customers across five states have reportedly discovered that the chain's slogan now comes with a stopwatch after federal health officials confirmed that lettuce from Mexico was the source of a widespread cyclospora outbreak.

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention identified shredded iceberg lettuce served at Taco Bell locations in Indiana, Kentucky, Michigan, Ohio and West Virginia as the culprit behind an outbreak that turned drive thru visits into drive by emergencies.

The CDC warned consumers not to eat the lettuce, while countless customers admitted that warning would have been much more helpful before lunch.

A Food and Drug Administration investigation traced the lettuce to a single supplier, whose identity remains secret, presumably because witness protection now extends to produce distributors.

"FDA is working with the supplier of iceberg lettuce to determine if potentially contaminated shredded iceberg lettuce remains on the market," including in other states, the CDC said. "Taco Bell has committed to stop using any lettuce from the supplier identified by FDA's traceback investigation."

Translation, somewhere in America, a warehouse full of lettuce is being interrogated under a bright lamp.

Federal investigators have been tracking the outbreak alongside public health officials as infections continue climbing. More than 30 states have reported cases this year, pushing totals beyond the previous U.S. record of roughly 4,700 infections set in 2019.

Public health experts insist the illness is usually not life threatening, a comforting message delivered to people currently memorizing every restroom location between home and work.

Earlier this week Taco Bell announced it had "voluntarily and temporarily removed limited ingredients at select restaurants as a precautionary measure. We will continue to closely monitor the situation and follow the guidance of public health authorities."

Translation again, the lettuce has been placed on administrative leave pending further investigation.

Cyclospora is a microscopic parasite that causes watery diarrhea "with frequent and sometimes explosive bowel movements," according to the CDC, making it perhaps the only government description that requires no embellishment whatsoever.

Officials say the parasite spreads through food contaminated by fecal matter, often from irrigation water. Somehow this fact still failed to convince people that ordering "extra lettuce" might not be the healthiest life choice.

Experts attribute the growing number of cases to climate change and improved detection methods, because in modern America every story must eventually arrive at climate change, even if it first makes several urgent stops at the restroom. Meanwhile, ordinary Americans have developed a simpler theory, perhaps restaurants should ensure the lettuce is not imported with complimentary parasites.

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Another Biden Border Catastrophe: Afghan “Ally” Shoots National Guard Troops in D.C., Yelling “Allahu Akbar” – And He Was Vetted!

Folks, here we go again. Just when you thought the Biden-Harris open-borders disaster couldn’t get any more deadly, an Afghan migrant who was fast-tracked into America under their chaotic 2021 evacuation shoots two young National Guard soldiers patrolling the streets of Washington, D.C. One is dead. The other is fighting for his life. And the suspect? He screamed “Allahu akbar!” while doing it.

Rahmanullah Lakanwal, 29, pleaded not guilty Tuesday – from his hospital bed, no less, where he’s recovering from wounds after police stopped his rampage just as he tried to reload.

He’s charged with assault with intent to kill while armed, possession of a firearm, possession of a firearm during a crime of violence, and murder. Bond denied – thank God for small miracles.The victims? Twenty-year-old Sarah Beckstrom of West Virginia, who tragically died the next day, and 24-year-old Andrew Wolfe, who remains in serious condition.

These kids had literally been sworn in less than 24 hours earlier. As U.S. Attorney for D.C. Jeanine Pirro said:

“Both Beckstrom and Wolfe ‘were sworn in less than 24 hours before they were shot on the street in Washington.’”

Beckstrom even volunteered to work over Thanksgiving so her fellow soldiers could be with their families. Heartbreaking.

West Virginia Governor Patrick Morrisey said Wolfe “remains in serious condition,” but is showing signs of movement and awareness.

President Trump, during Tuesday’s Cabinet meeting, revealed he’d spoken directly with Wolfe’s parents:

“They said he didn’t have a chance,” Trump recalled. “I will tell you, the one who said he is going to live is his mother … ‘Sir, he is going to live.’ I spoke to her very soon after this horrible event took place with this scum that is able to come into our country.”

“I spoke to his mother, ‘Sir, he’s going to be okay. I’m telling you.’ No doctor thought that. Nobody thought that. He was hit bad places. She was so positive, it was incredible. And possibly right. … That would be amazing. If he lives, it would be amazing, a miracle, actually.”

Pray for that young man. Pray for both families.

Now here’s the part that should infuriate every American: Lakanwal was brought here in 2021 under Biden’s infamous “Operation Allies Welcome” – the same frantic airlift that dumped roughly 77,000 Afghans into the country with what even DHS now admits was laughably inadequate vetting.

He got asylum in April. Why? Because, we’re told, he supposedly worked with U.S. entities in Afghanistan – including, according to former CIA Director John Ratcliffe, the agency itself.So the same administration that left billions in equipment and Americans behind in Kabul turned around and flew in tens of thousands of people – and at least one of them just murdered an American soldier on our own soil while shouting the jihadist war cry.

The Trump administration has already responded by halting asylum decisions and stopping new Afghan visas. About time someone slammed the door shut.

This is what happens when you treat national security like a giant welcome wagon. Sarah Beckstrom is never coming home. Andrew Wolfe is clinging to life. And the people who created this preventable nightmare still won’t admit they were wrong.Never forget: they called it “Operation Allies Welcome.”

One of those “allies” just declared war on America – again.

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Family Gives Update on 24-Year-Old National Guardsman Andrew Wolfe After Shooting Near White House

(Photo left: Andrew Wolfe’s family / Photo right: 24-year-old Andrew Wolfe sources: Facebook & FBI)

The 24-year-old Air National Guardsman from West Virginia, Andrew Wolfe, is still in critical condition in the hospital after being shot Wednesday in an ambush-style, jihad-inspired attack near the White House. His family has been sharing updates on social media about how he is doing after surgery.

On Thursday, President Trump spoke with the military and sadly announced that the second Guardsman who was standing next to Wolfe, U.S. Army Specialist Sarah Beckstrom, had died in the hospital with her parents by her side.

On Friday, Wolfe's mom said her son had been out of surgery for a few hours. Doctors are letting his brain swell a little on purpose right now, and the next 24 to 48 hours are the most important. The prior day, NBC News reached out to the family. At first, Andrew's dad, Jason, didn't want to talk. Then he said, "Just pray for my son."

Here's what Andrew's mother, Melody Wolfe, posted on Facebook:

"Hey there, Andy’s been out of surgery for a few hours. His brain is being allowed space to swell and this first 24 to 48 hours is the biggest thing right now. They have no clue about any lasting effects right now because we’re in this very first stage. The first two weeks will be a waiting game. Right now he's surviving and alive. We got to see him in ICU and he's sedated. It feels like a nightmare and this doesn’t feel real."

Later that day, she shared a more hopeful update:

"I want to give everyone an update on our boy. We talked with the neurologist this morning and he said Andy is doing better than they imagined. He's reacting to stimuli and is opening eyes and trying to move around. They are making sure he is sedated to allow the brain to heal so he is not feeling any pain. With this being said though, we know that with a brain swell, it'll get worse before it gets better. But the neurosurgeon is hopeful that things are moving in the right direction. Andy has a very long road ahead and right now we are going hour by hour but miracles are already occurring just with his progress he’s making so far. Your prayers and love mean so much to us and we need you guys to continue lifting Andy's name up. He will be a walking testimony through this. Our God is good and miracles are happening as we speak.

I do want to make sure everyone knows we ARE NOT starting any Go Fund Me’s. I believe there’s one out there but we are wanting for nothing. We want prayers, your love, and your support. That’s the most important thing right now. So please, if you see a Go Fund Me, screenshot it and send it to me so we can make sure no one gives to these. We love you all and again, we cannot thank you enough for everything our community, state, and nation are doing to show support."

Andrew joined the West Virginia Air National Guard on February 5, 2019. He works with the 167th Airlift Wing and was helping with a new program in Washington, D.C. called the "D.C. Safe and Beautiful Mission" that started in August. The program brings together different government groups to keep the nation’s capital safe, clean, and welcoming.

A friend named Brooke Davison, who met Andrew through a local cornhole league, told former newspaper The New York Times that he never worried about his safety while working in D.C.

"Andy is easily one of the strongest, determined and God-fearing men I know," Davison said. "I have no doubt he has the willpower in him to come out on top of this."

Berkeley County Schools in West Virginia sent an email saying Andrew graduated from Musselman High School in 2019. The school is very proud of him and is supporting his family. "During his time at Musselman High, he was an active, engaged, and high-achieving student who embodied the Applemen spirit, contributing positively to our school community both academically and athletically,” said Musselman High School principal Alicia Riggleman.

Let's do what Andrew's father, Jason, asked for--let's pray for his recovery.

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WV Dems are really pissed at Biden's pardon choices: 'what we would expect from Trump'

Look, a dead bird

West Virginia Democrats blasted so called President Biden's clemency recipient choices and said they would expect President-elect Trump to do such actions, because everything evil in the world is due to Orange Man Bad. 

WV Democrats tend to forget that Trump already was president and didn't do the evil thing they now accuse him of planning to do, but at least they are beginning to see that the Vegetable in Chief has made a very poor move which should hurt his Party in the future.

In a statement released late on Monday, local party leaders said they praised Biden for guiding the U.S. "through significant economic challenges" but criticized the commutations given to people convicted of public corruption. Interestingly enough, the criticism is correct about the commutations, but to say that Biden led the nation "through significant economic challenges" is only partly correct. Yes, he was the leader during economic challenges, but only made the economy worse.

Inflation rates spiked to a 40-year high which significantly increased the cost of living for the average American. Consumer sentiment has been negative or at best, skeptical due to ongoing high costs for essentials such as food and fuel. And the national debt has been blown out of the water, which could create long-term economic risks and higher borrowing costs along with fiscal instability.

Meanwhile, the WV Democrats had more to say. 

"Public corruption is a betrayal of trust. When officials abuse the power of their office for personal gain, they not only harm the communities they are supposed to serve, but they also erode faith in our government institutions," wrote Chairman Mike Pushkin, a state lawmaker from Kanawha County.

"Even more troubling, these kinds of pardons are exactly what we would expect from President-elect Donald Trump, not President Biden," he couldn't stop himself from adding so as to avoid stink-eye from his peers.

Pushkin and other Democrats were especially upset about the barely sentient POTUS's decision to pardon Michael Conahan, the disgraced Pennsylvania judge at the center of the "kids-for-cash" scandal. He was found guilty of taking bribes to send young kids to for-profit prisons.

Delegate Hollis Lewis, (D-Charleston) also had a problem with Biden's choice to grant clemency to Conahan, according to Fox News Digital.

"The one that got me upset was the judge who was involved in the cash-for-kids case," he said.

"Any time that you have individuals who prey on our most vulnerable population, which are children and the elderly, that's very problematic."

Lewis pointed out that presidents from both parties have occasionally made questionable decisions on clemency, noting that a pardon can be a useful tool if used correctly.

"I don't think anybody needs to walk around with a scarlet letter of a felony for the whole lot, depending on the particular crime that they committed; if that pardon is going to allow them to move on with their lives," he said.

"But specifically when it's crimes involving the elderly… and children or crimes with patterns of violence where the evidence is clear and there's no reasonable doubt, then maybe we ought to think twice before we exonerate those individuals."

In their statement, the West Virginia Democratic Party (WVDP) also attacked Biden for pardoning Rita Crundwell, the former comptroller of Dixon, Illinois, who was convicted for embezzling $54 million, which was the largest municipal fraud case in the U.S.

They also brought up the case of Jimmy Dimora, a former Cleveland county commissioner caught in a pay-to-play scheme.

West Virginia has been in the spotlight before during times when presidents grant pardons, like when former President Bill Clinton pardoned fugitive financier Marc Rich, a decision that was heavily criticized.

Rich was accused of tax evasion and dodging sanctions against Iran and apartheid South Africa.

However, Rich also owned part of an aluminum plant on the Ohio River accused of illegally locking out 1,500 workers and hiring replacements during labor disputes.

Members of the West Virginia union were said to have protested in front of Rich's office in Switzerland.

Clinton's pardons of Rich and his business partner Pincus Green led to a federal investigation, initially handled by New York prosecutor Mary Jo White.

After White's term ended in 2002, she was succeeded by a young prosecutor whose name would come up again in another Clinton scandal years later: James Comey.

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Democrats betray Manchin: can I get an LOL

Sen. Joe Manchin (D-WV) went along with his party last month and got him to cave on the misnamed Inflation Reduction Act. This shocked many Republicans as well as a few Democrats, because he seemed to have been the voice of reason on the Left and we all thought he was going to vote against this ridiculous bill.

However, in July, Sen. Majority Leader Chuck Schumer and his substantial nostrils was joined by Manchin to announce support for the $740 billion fiscally irresponsible bill whose title is an oxymoron. This bill will not only not reduce inflation, it will likely increase it and it's actually about climate change and drunken sailor spending to deal with it. The bill will subsidize green energy programs, dramatically expand the army of the IRS, and raise taxes on the middle class while lying about it as they do it.

Manchin was promised by alleged President Joe Biden and other Democratic liars that they will facilitate the approval of a gas pipeline in West Virginia. In order to do that, they would have to pass legislation that would “overhaul the permitting process for energy infrastructure,” according to The American Prospect, a liberal website.

But as it turns out, House progressives don't want to support something that  “could undercut the IRA’s down payment on clean energy by accelerating approval for energy projects that could ramp up U.S. fossil fuel production and exports of natural gas,” The American Prospect reported. So Manchin is screwed, just like he did to the country.

House Democrats were reportedly angry that they didn't get called on to negotiate with Manchin, according to The Washington Times. 

Now they don't plan to honor the agreement and this hopefully will hurt Manchin with West Virginia voters.

In a statement to the Prospect, Michigan's Jew-hating POS Democrat Rep. Rashida Tlaib, wrote:

“Handshake deals made by others in closed rooms do not dictate how I vote, and we sure as hell don’t owe Joe Manchin anything now. He and his fossil fuel donors already got far too much in the IRA … and we will vote this dirty deal down, one way or another.”

What a woman of integrity, love and chutzpah.

Other Democrats joined in on the Manchin trashing.

California Rep. Jared Huffman said he refuses to be “steamrolled into a bunch of fossil fuel giveaways just because Manchin cut a deal in a closed room with Chuck Schumer,” the Times reported.

I think I may have just wet myself.

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Welcome to reality, Joe. You gave away your reputation for integrity, honesty and fairness and made a deal with the devil Democrats and they sold you out. 

I hope you are satisfied, you freaking hypocrite.

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Good "guy" with a gun, shoots bad guy with a gun; saves lives

A West Virginia woman fatally shot a man who began firing a rifle into a crowd in Charleston, WV Wednesday night.

The man, Dennis Butler, 37, was black, so it's likely not going to be reported by the left stream media because it doesn't fit their narrative.

The incident was apparently sparked after people were at a graduation birthday party outside a Renaissance Circle apartment complex and Butler, earlier in the evening, was in a vehicle and was warned to slow down because children were playing.

So the bad guy with a gun left but returned later to the complex where he began firing at the crowd.

The good "guy" with a gun was attending the party and she drew her handgun and fired on Butler, killing him. Nobody at the party was injured.

The woman waited for the police to arrive, and she and several witnesses have cooperated with the investigation.

"Instead of running from the threat, she engaged with the threat and saved several lives last night," Chief of Detectives Tony Hazelett told news outlets Thursday. He said that no charges would be filed against the brave hero.

It was revealed in a MetroNews "Talkline" show Thursday that Butlerr was a convicted felon who had served time in the slammer on several occasions. Obviously, he was not permitted to own a firearm but this is yet another example of an outlaw breaking the law, proving that gun control is not a sufficient device for stopping gun violence.

The NRA said it best: when guns are outlawed, only outlaws will have guns.

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We need better measures to determine the mental health status of potential gun purchasers and security measures in our schools to protect our children. For example, one entrance, a metal detector with bag inspections, and all other doors locked from the outside. Teachers with gun training and carrying would be great too, but they're generally opposed to such child and self-defense methods.

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"Wind Beneath My Dress" singer makes disgusting remarks about W Virginians being "poor, illiterate"

It's one thing to disagree with a person's political ideology, and quite another to attack that person ad hominem along with the people of his state because of those disagreements. 

That is exactly what Bette Midler did when Sen. Joe Manchin (D-WV) voted the way his constituents wanted him to vote: against the "drunken sailor in a whorehouse" spending bill known as Build Back Better, which would have cost the taxpayers somewhere in the neighborhood of three trillion dollars with a future spending that would just keep going and going.

On Monday, Midler took to Twitter to attack Joe Manchin--she tweeted:

"What #JoeManchin, who represents a population smaller than Brooklyn, has done to the rest of America, who wants to move forward, not backward, like his state, is horrible. He sold us out. He wants us all to be just like his state, West Virginia. Poor, illiterate and strung out."

What a piece of work.

While Brooklyn has 2.9 people living under the fist of Mayor Bill de Blasio for another few days, Manchin's constituency of about 1.8 million people are represented by him and his vote against BBB was for them, not for people in Brooklyn. That's what he is elected to do, not what Bette Midler wants him to do.

And it's no big surprise that he voted against the BBB--he said he would months ago if his party didn't cut the spending down. Why are they acting surprised?

After her anti-West Virginia tweet, Midler, 76, began taking a lot of heat for the bile she spewed. She realized the best thing to do would be to apologize for her thoughtless remarks about West Virginians she cruelly judged but never even met:

"I apologize to the good people of WVA for my last outburst," she tweeted. "I’m just seeing red; #JoeManchin and his whole family are a criminal enterprise. Is he really the best WV has to offer its own citizens? Surely there’s someone there who has the state’s interests at heart, not his own!"

So her apology included an attack on Joe Manchin again, and now his family. 

What a grody shoal [see Urban Dictionary] Midler shows herself to be, and it wasn't long before she attacked Manchin again. "His indifference is immense. Like the rest of his family, he hasn’t a shred of conscience," she wrote.

It's obvious Midler knows nothing about Joe Manchin other than the fact that he didn't vote the way she wanted, or the way people who are the least affected by gross inflation wanted him to vote. Attacking his family is a childish reaction and speaks volumes about Midler's offscreen character.

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Manchin appeared on "Fox News Sunday," He told host Bret Baier that he had spoken to alleged President Biden, House Speaker Nancy "Dancing Hands" Pelosi (D-CA) and Senate Majority Leader Chuck "Nostrils" Schumer (D-NY) but they couldn't reach an agreement in BBB. They wanted to blow out the spending and go full commie and this didn't sit well with Manchin, who had said months ago that he would not vote for such an irresponsible piece of legislation. 

"I've done everything humanly possible," Manchin said, explaining how hard he has worked to try to reach an acceptable compromise on the bill, but the left wouldn't budge and neither would he.

Manchin said that with inflation increasing, the national debt, "geopolitical unrest," and the current pandemic, the Build Back Better bill by Biden [or his puppet master] was too much to accept.

Meanwhile, Bette Midler is still a pompous ass who knows what is actually in the BBB bill as much as Alexandria Obviously-Commie knows about economics.

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