Breaking: CENTCOM launches self-defense strikes against Iran

U.S. Central Command (CENTCOM) forces launched self-defense strikes against the Islamic state at 5:00 p.m. ET today at the direction of our Commander in Chief, President Donald Trump. This comes in response to a downing of a U.S. Apache helicopter yesterday.

The mission is stupidly proportional to this unjustified aggression. I say stupidly because when someone hits you in the nose, you don't just hit him in the nose in retaliation--you beat the crap out of him. 

There were two servicemen in that helicopter that were rescued at sea and are doing fine.

CENTCOM described the strikes as defensive and would be proportional, as I stated.

There have been several explosions in the port city of Sirik and nearby areas of Hormozgan Province like Kuhestak and Minab, as Iranina media noted blasts in the area.

Sirik is a small, strategically located port town on Iran's southern coast in the Strait of Hormuz region.

Some reports also reference military activity near Bandar Abbas, a major Iranian naval port.

There are reports of many KC-135s flying over the Middle East as I write this, indicating a likely scenario where fighter aircraft are ready to go.

More details to follow.

What ceasefire?

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BREAKING: Jury reached a verdict in the Karmelo Anthony murder trial

Anthony is now facing life in prison.

A Collin County, Texas jury on Tuesday found 19-year-old Karmelo Anthony guilty of murdering 17-year-old high school athlete Austin Metcalf, bringing an end to one of the most closely watched murder trials in the country.

Anthony, who was 17 at the time of the killing, was tried as an adult. He now faces anywhere from five years to life in prison after being convicted of first-degree murder.

Just before the verdict was read, CBS reporter J.D. Miles noted that more than two dozen deputies had been stationed outside the courtroom as tensions mounted. A crowd gathered outside the courthouse chanting, “Free Karmelo.”

The case exploded into the national spotlight after Anthony, who is black, fatally stabbed Metcalf, who was white, during a track event in Frisco, Texas in April 2025. The story gained traction not only because of the circumstances surrounding the killing, but because much of the corporate press seemed strangely uninterested in covering it. Had the racial dynamics been reversed, everyone knows the media cycle would have looked very different.

The trial itself moved quickly. Jury selection began June 1 and the proceedings wrapped in just nine days. Throughout the trial, prosecutors presented video footage and witness testimony showing Anthony initiated the confrontation with Metcalf and that deadly force was not justified. Even testimony from defense witnesses undercut the self-defense narrative pushed by Anthony’s legal team.

Anthony notably declined to testify in his own defense.

The racial narrative promoted by Anthony’s family also fell apart once witnesses took the stand. Several black teenage witnesses called by the prosecution testified that Anthony was in the wrong and described Metcalf as a respected friend and leader.

One of the most emotional moments came when a young male witness who knew both teens broke down in tears while describing the killing.

“That was my brother, that was my brother that got stabbed,” he said.

Investigative journalist Sarah Fields, who attended the trial, reported that the witness was directly asked whether the case was about race.

“No,” the teen responded. “Austin was a leader and he protected us.”

Video evidence further dismantled claims that Anthony had been cornered or threatened by a mob. Footage showed Metcalf confronting Anthony alone. According to witness testimony, Metcalf explicitly told Anthony he was not going to fight him.

Meanwhile, supporters of Anthony have maintained a presence outside the courthouse since the start of the trial, with some making inflammatory racial remarks and publicly attacking the victim. Authorities increased security around the courthouse early Tuesday morning amid concerns about possible unrest following the verdict.

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SPLC CEO Suddenly Develops Deep Respect For Attorney-Client Privilege After Jim Jordan Starts Asking Questions

The Southern Poverty Law Center’s interim president and CEO discovered Tuesday that the English language apparently contains no suitable words for “no” after House Judiciary Chairman Jim Jordan began asking inconvenient questions about the organization’s alleged extremist infiltration program.

Bryan Fair spent most of the hearing performing what legal experts are calling “Olympic-level verbal dodgeball,” repeatedly responding with some variation of “our counsel in the Middle District of Alabama will address that allegation” anytime Jordan asked whether the SPLC had, hypothetically speaking, funded activities that sounded suspiciously like the plot of a rejected FBI screenplay.

Jordan walked Fair through allegations laid out in a superseding federal indictment claiming the SPLC used donor cash to bankroll confidential “field sources” embedded in extremist groups. According to the indictment, those operatives allegedly did far more than quietly observe. They reportedly hosted rallies, expanded hate group chapters, recruited members, and even purchased materials for cross burnings. Because apparently “monitoring extremism” now comes with an event planning budget.

Fair declined to directly deny any of it.

“It seems to me if the answer is no, you could just say no,” Jordan told Fair after the latest round of interpretive legal theater.

Fair responded with the now-classic Washington defense strategy of saying absolutely nothing while using the maximum number of syllables possible.

The hearing became even more entertaining when Jordan rattled off a list of alleged shell companies with names sounding less like legitimate businesses and more like aliases used by cartoon villains trying to evade IRS audits: Fox Photography, North West Technologies, Tech Writers Group, Rare Books Warehouse, Imagery Ink, J&J Electronics, Center Investigative Agency, and Kelly’s Marine.

Jordan suggested the companies may have been used to funnel roughly $4 million to field operatives while conveniently obscuring the paper trail. Fair insisted any knowledge he had came through privileged conversations with attorneys, which critics noted is an impressive amount of legal confidentiality for someone who supposedly runs the organization.

Then came the awkward moment.

Jordan asked whether SPLC fundraising surged after the 2017 Charlottesville rally, where the indictment alleges one SPLC-paid source helped coordinate transportation for participants. Fair admitted donations skyrocketed, but quickly credited Donald Trump’s 2016 victory instead. Jordan pointed out the group’s fundraising reportedly exploded from $51 million to $133 million in a single year, which observers noted is quite the financial growth strategy for an organization dedicated to “fighting hate.”

Fair eventually volunteered one clear statement, explaining the program existed “to protect our staff and to protect the public.”

Americans everywhere breathed a sigh of relief knowing the safest way to fight extremism is apparently to organize it personally.

Jordan closed the hearing with one final question, asking Fair whether he knew the president of the National Socialist Party.

Fair responded exactly as viewers expected: “That’s an allegation in the indictment that will be responded to by counsel.”

At press time, SPLC officials were reportedly considering rebranding the organization as “Lawyers Without Direct Answers.”

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Former Platner Staffer Calls BS On Dem’s “It’s Just A Military Thing” Excuse For Nazi Tattoo, Troubling Pattern Of Being A Democrat

Only an idiot would get a tattoo that [s]he had no idea of its meaning

Platner’s former political director said her boss [Vorgesetzter] knew the meaning behind his Nazi tattoo and “exhibits a pattern of dishonest behavior.” 

In a stunning act of basic human decency rarely seen in modern Democratic politics, the former political director of Graham Platner’s Senate campaign has blown the whistle on her ex-boss, alleging the aspiring lawmaker knew exactly what that SS lightning-bolt tattoo meant and has a well-established habit of, well, being the kind of guy Democrats rush to defend anyway.

In an op-ed for The Washington Post, former Maine state representative Genevieve McDonald revealed that her blind enthusiasm for the Platner campaign hit a brick wall the moment reality intruded.

“Taking the job meant leaving a position as a senior policy adviser at a government relations firm in the state, but I thought that Platner and I shared the same goal: fighting for the working people of Maine,” she wrote on Monday. “I quit the campaign in October, disturbed by what I learned about the candidate and concerned about his potential impact on the Democratic Party’s prospects in my home state.”

The op-ed serves as a dire warning to the Democratic Party as voters head to the polls on Tuesday to nominate someone—anyone—to lose to incumbent Republican Senator Sudan Collins in November.

Back in September, Platner casually informed McDonald that he had a “problematic” tattoo that might raise a few eyebrows, but assured her it was just a “military thing.” [Actually, it was a Nazi thing.]

“I believed him,” she wrote in the WAPO. “Then, I began receiving calls from Washington warning me he was not who he seemed: ‘Have you read his oppo file?’ I had not. I trusted that his out-of-state consulting team had thoroughly vetted him.”

Her account lines up with New York Times reporting that Platner was fully aware of the meaning behind his infamous Nazi SS tattoo, the same one he previously pretended was some mysterious ancient Celtic symbol for “diversity is our strength,” when, in fact, it means more like: "killing Jews is our national sport." 

McDonald finally jumped ship after old Reddit posts from 2013 resurfaced in which Platner downplayed sexual assault, because of course he did.

After departing, she turned down a $15,000 bribe to sign a nondisclosure agreement, proving she possesses more integrity than the entire DNC combined.

McDonald then took aim at the usual progressive suspects rushing to Platner’s defense, including Vermont Senator Comrade Bernie "Kill the Olagarks" Sanders, who shrugged, “Is he a saint? I guess not. I don’t know too many saints here.”

“His comment reflects one of the deepest problems in American politics today. We have learned to excuse what we should condemn,” McDonald wrote. “There are two other named candidates on Tuesday’s ballot. If Platner wins the nomination but later withdraws, Maine Democrats can hold a convention and choose a different nominee.”

“The answer to a broken political culture is not to accept it. Demand better from those entrusted with power or seeking it. Enough is enough,” she added.

Republicans, meanwhile, are sharpening their knives and stocking up on popcorn, fully prepared to turn every Platner scandal into a 30-second ad that writes itself.

With no serious opposition, Platner is heavily favored to cruise to victory in Tuesday’s primary. The only remaining mystery is how many Maine Democrats will hold their noses, vote for the guy anyway, and then spend the general election pretending they never heard of him while their Senate flip dreams go up in a cloud of swastika-shaped smoke.

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Congress Forced To Pause Entire Government After Rashida Tlaib Suffers Severe Emotional Damage From Mean Words

Tlaib famously able to touch her nose with her lips

WASHINGTON, D.C. — The U.S. House of Representatives was thrown into a veritable clusterfrack this week after Rep. Rashida Tlaib (D-MI), reportedly suffered a critical outbreak of democracy when Rep. Max Miller (R-OH), said things out loud that weren’t pre-approved by congressional sensitivity coordinators.

The dramatic scene unfolded during debate over a Lebanon war powers resolution, where Tlaib accused Israel of committing atrocities while demanding the United States stop supporting America’s closest ally in the Middle East.

"We must end U.S. participation in the Israeli apartheid regime’s invasion of Lebanon. The Israeli military continues to target journalists like Amal Khalil and use our tax dollars to commit war crimes," said Tlaib.

At that point, Miller apparently made the grave error of responding.

"Its members are butchers that you like to hang out with to a certain extent," charged Miller. "Yes, you advocate for terrorists on a daily basis. You advocate for a terrorist regime every single day."

Witnesses say the Capitol immediately entered DEFCON 1 after a Republican criticized a Democrat too directly.

Tlaib reportedly shouted across the chamber, though congressional stenographers were unable to translate the remarks because they were delivered at the frequency usually associated with malfunctioning smoke detectors.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Are we getting a little emotional?" chided Miller.

Congressional sources confirmed this sentence caused more destruction to the institution than the national debt, insider trading, and 40 years of continuing resolutions combined.

Rep. Jay Obernolte (R-CA) desperately attempted to restore order before the House descended into full therapy session.

"Colleagues, this is a serious topic. We will debate it respectfully and deliberately," admonished Obernolte.

Tlaib then invoked the sacred congressional ritual known as "words taken down," a process originally created so lawmakers could survive exposure to opposing opinions.

"Yes, Mr. Speaker, I am. That is a direct attack on my character. I please request to strike the words down," said Tlaib.

The House immediately suspended all legislative activity while officials launched an emergency investigation into whether anyone’s feelings had been insufficiently validated.

For nearly an hour, Congress halted debate, amendments, and votes to determine whether Miller’s remarks violated the chamber’s strict rules prohibiting members from saying what everyone just heard them say.

Eventually, Obernolte ruled against Miller.

"The words of the gentleman from Ohio contain an allegation that the gentlewoman from Michigan is a ‘butcher’ and affiliated with a terrorist organization," said Obernolte. "Such remarks impugn the patriotism and loyalty of the member of the House."

The ruling effectively sentenced Miller to congressional solitary confinement for the remainder of the day, though lawmakers noted that punishment still falls short of forcing him to watch MSNBC.

But Republicans were not backing down.

House Foreign Affairs Committee Chairman Brian Mast (R-FL) delivered a message from Miller after House leadership confiscated his speaking privileges like a middle-school principal taking away a vape pen.

"‘Yes, I said it. I own it. And I stand by it,’" Mast declared.

Mast then attempted to enter articles regarding Tlaib’s alleged associations into the congressional record, but Tlaib objected faster than CNN fact-checkers during a Trump speech.

Meanwhile, lawmakers also discussed whether artificial intelligence could someday referee congressional disputes.

"AI is actually very good at this," said Obernolte. "You give it a rules manual and then you give it a specific instance and say ‘Is this in compliance with rules or is this a violation of the rules?’"

Experts agreed Congress would likely embrace AI immediately once they discovered it could automatically censor Republicans without requiring overtime from parliamentary staff.

At press time, House Democrats were reportedly drafting new rules prohibiting "microaggressions," "hostile eye contact," and "excessive disagreement."

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Penn Station stabbing suspect in custody, at least for now

Comrade Zohran Mamdani

Five commuters were stabbed at New York’s Penn Station late Sunday night in what authorities are calling a “random attack” by a “deranged man,” which in modern New York political terminology means “a vibrant expression of urban diversity.”

The suspect is in custody, at least until the city’s revolving-door justice system remembers that accountability is problematic and decides he deserves a taxpayer-funded second, third, or seventeenth chance, depending on his melatonin level and political affiliation.

The bloody attack has once again raised concerns about public safety in the city, particularly with President Trump scheduled to be directly above Penn Station tonight at Madison Square Garden for Game 3 between the Knicks and Spurs. Apparently, even attending a basketball game in Manhattan now comes with the ambiance of a live-action crime documentary.

Five victims were hospitalized, including one with serious injuries.

The rampage reportedly began shortly after 7 p.m. at the busy Midtown transit hub. According to officials, victims suffered injuries ranging from minor to severe before Amtrak police apprehended the suspect.

An Amtrak spokesperson confirmed the arrest, while stunned commuters posted images online showing police tending to bleeding victims in the station.

 
The New York Times reported that six individuals were stabbed, including the suspect himself, who reportedly suffered “minor injuries,” proving once again that in New York, the criminal often winds up getting nearly as much sympathy as the people he attacked.

New Yorkers also learned from the Daniel Penny saga that intervening to stop violent chaos can be a faster route to prosecution than actually committing the violence. So naturally, most commuters now keep their heads down and pray they are not the next contestant in Gotham’s nightly lottery of urban disorder.

Meanwhile, Democrats continue insisting Americans should abandon their cars and embrace public transit while refusing to address the violent crime, rampant homelessness, untreated mental illness, and general lawlessness that make many people avoid public transit in the first place. 

It's beginning to sound like London's mayor trying to ban knives because they're used in terrorist [Islamist] attacks on Londoners.

Naturally, Mayor Zohran Mamdani responded with the kind of sterile bureaucratic statement that sounds like it was generated by an AI trained entirely on diversity seminar pamphlets.

“I’ve been briefed on the horrific stabbing at Penn Station. Based on the information available right now, six people were stabbed and the alleged perpetrator is in custody following a swift response from the Amtrak Police Department,” he wrote on X. 

He almost added: "My heart goes out to the real victim in this incident, the man who was fed up with the system and went on a stabbing spree."

“My heart is with everyone who was injured, [whatever that actually means] their loved ones, and all those shaken by this unacceptable violence. I’m wishing each of the victims a full and speedy recovery. I’m grateful to the Amtrak Police Department and the first responders who acted quickly to apprehend the suspect and provide emergency care. There are currently no impacts to Amtrak service. My administration is in contact with Amtrak officials as they investigate this incident.”

Noticeably absent from the statement was any serious plan to stop criminals from terrorizing commuters in the first place. But perhaps that would conflict with the Mamdani governing philosophy that crime is less a criminal issue and more a misunderstood form of economic self-expression.

Under the progressive worldview, the real villain is not the guy stabbing strangers at Penn Station. It is apparently “systemic inequity,” “housing insecurity,” or insufficient access to taxpayer-funded artisanal co-ops.

And because this is New York City, there is a very good chance the suspect already has a rap sheet long enough to qualify as serialized fiction. Odds are he has been arrested repeatedly, released repeatedly, and excused repeatedly, all in the name of “equity” and “criminal justice reform.” After all, isn't he the real victim here?

At some point, normal people begin to notice the pattern. The city arrests violent offenders, progressive activists demand compassion, leftist judges release them, politicians hold press conferences, and commuters continue bleeding on subway platforms while the ruling class lectures everyone about the importance of taking mass transit to save the planet.

Maybe this is all a secret plan to lower the planet's population for the sake of the environment. Who knows?

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BREAKING: Massive earthquake kills dozens, injures over 200 in Philippines

Dozens of people were killed and more than two hundred injured on Monday after a powerful earthquake of magnitude 7.8 struck the Philippines.

The tremor struck south of the island of Mindanao, shaking at least twenty-two million people with severe or moderate force. Officials confirmed at least thirty-two deaths, more than two hundred injuries, and the displacement of hundreds of thousands of residents in what was described as the strongest earthquake to hit the country in nearly four decades.

The quake prompted tsunami warnings across the region, although American officials quickly stated that Hawaii faced no threat. Warnings were also issued for nearby areas including Taiwan, Japan, Guam, and Papua New Guinea.

"The national government is moving and we will not leave Mindanao behind," said Philippine President Ferdinand Marcos Jr. "I am in constant communication with our regional offices and local chief executives on the ground."

Mindanao is the second-largest island in the Philippines and is home to more than twenty-seven million people. Earthquakes are common in the region. According to the U.S. Geological Survey, at least thirty-five earthquakes measuring above magnitude 7 have struck the area since 1900. 

Marcos Jr. also announced that he had ordered "the suspensions of all classes in all levels across affected areas in Mindanao until further notice. The safety of our children comes first."He urged residents to take tsunami warnings seriously, telling them to "move to higher ground now. Do not wait. Your life is more important than anything left behind."

The U.S. Geological Survey estimated a 42 percent chance that the death toll would fall between ten and one hundred people, and a 32 percent chance that fatalities could range from one hundred to one thousand. The agency also estimated a 39 percent probability that economic losses would total between one hundred million dollars and one billion dollars. Officials said the earthquake was caused by thrust faulting, a process in which one section of the Earth's crust moves upward over another along a fault line.

One local resident told The New York Times that he rushed to higher ground with his young daughter after the earthquake struck.

"I was very scared, my knees were trembling," Julius Golez said. "We were crying; so many other people were also crying."

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Israel and Iran announced Monday that they would stop attacking each other, bringing a temporary end to the Middle East’s newest round of “No, YOU calm down first.”

AI Generated

Israel has decided to stop its attacks on Iran following pressure from President Trump and ongoing ceasefire negotiations, according to Israeli and regional officials cited by the Times of Israel.

Sources say the arrangement was reached after both countries simultaneously realized they were running low on missiles and emotionally exhausted government spokesmen who claimed they were "too pooped to pop."

A regional official said the United States informed Iran there would be no further Israeli strikes if Tehran halted its missile attacks. Iran later announced it would stop attacks if Israel ended its offensive, marking the first time in modern diplomacy that two enemies settled a conflict with the international equivalent of “Fine, whatever.” 

Anyone with a functioning cortex knows this is only a temporary ceasefire and Iran will be the first to break it when they think Trump is looking elsewhere.

An Israeli official told Hebrew media that the decision to pause strikes came at Trump's request, reportedly after the president spent several hours on the phone saying, “Guys, seriously, knock it off. I’m trying to enjoy my Monday, and the Knicks are leading in the finals.”

At the same time, the official stressed that Israel's campaign against Hezbollah in Lebanon will continue, because apparently the Middle East still believes in having side quests.

“The sense is that this round of fighting is behind us,” the official said. “We are awaiting a final decision from the political leadership.”

Citizens across the region celebrated the news by cautiously checking whether anyone meant it this time, deciding those chances are about equal to finding a beached whale in Times Square.

The development comes after Iran launched its first direct missile attack on Israel since the ceasefire took effect, prompting Israeli retaliatory strikes on military targets inside Iran and reminding the world that ceasefires in the region often come with optional terms and conditions.

According to reports, Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu and President Trump spoke by phone Monday before Tehran signaled it was prepared to halt attacks if Israel ceased operations tied to the latest escalation.

At publishing time, both nations had reportedly resumed yelling at each other online and fired off offensive emojis.

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