Monday, October 26, 2026

Mamdani's Spanish language video sparks calls of treason

Smells his own flatulence

Behold the utopia of Greater Gotham, where the municipal government is now officially a wholly-owned subsidiary of the global open-borders lobby. "Come one, come all!"

Mayor Zohran Mamdani recently decided that his primary fiduciary duty as the chief executive of America’s financial capital is to act as a pro-bono defense attorney for individuals who bypassed every legal checkpoint to get here.

In a viral broadcast dripping with bureaucratic compassion, the city's self-styled revolutionary treated us to a masterclass in civic subversion. Speaking in Spanish, the socialist mayor offered a handy instruction manual on how to evade federal immigration authorities, complete with stage directions for dodging accountability.

"If you encounter ICE, here's what every New Yorker should know," comrade Mamdani posted on X.

According to our fearless leader, ICE "cannot enter private spaces like your home, school, hospitals or private areas of a workplace without a judicial warrant signed by a judge."

Naturally, citizens who pay taxes, follow the rule of law, and expect the government to enforce actual borders were less than thrilled. The pushback from federal lawmakers was swift and pointed.

"It should be insulting to every American that the mayor of our largest city is a guy who became a citizen less than a decade ago and now spends his time coaching illegal aliens in a foreign language on how they can avoid being lawfully deported," posted Rep. Brandon Gill (R-TX).

"Unless you're here illegally, you have no reason to fear ICE," posted actor Dean Cain. "This wanker is dangerous."

"At no point in this video is anyone urged to abide by the laws of the United States," posted Sen. Mike Lee (R-MI). "Because it was not made for the benefit of the people of the United States."

"If you're here illegally, you're not a New Yorker," posted Rep. Nancy Mace (R-NC). "Period."

"Treason," posted Sen. Bernie Moreno (R-OH)..

Commentators also noted the sheer audacity of running a sanctuary metropolis funded by the productive class.


"Here we are in 2026 with foreign born Democrats instructing illegals how to evade the law and remain in our country to suck off our system and best case scenario free load off our hard work," posted Tomi Lahren, mistaking Mamdani for a Democrat when he's actually a socialist anti-Semite.

Judicial Watch President Tom Fitton added, "Dangerous incitement full of disturbing falsehoods by communist terrorist supporter @NYCMayor. This statement could put lives in danger."

None of this should surprise anyone paying attention. 

Mamdani's entire political brand is built on treating federal law as a joke. Since taking office, he has aggressively expanded sanctuary city policies, effectively drawing a legal moat around the five boroughs to keep federal authorities at bay, all while ensuring that municipal agencies look the other way.

It seems that New Yorkers have forgotten what happened on a sunny morning on a September day back in 2001. Of course, some of them may be sleeping with the enemy.

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Sunday, October 25, 2026

Death toll hits 9 after Islamists open fire on Christian funeral in Jordan; officials gently suggest “extremist” ideology might be involved


A handful of mostly peaceful  gunmen decided Friday was the perfect day to interrupt a funeral at a Greek Orthodox church in Karak, Jordan, roughly 55 miles south of Amman. They merely killed nine people and wounded more than two dozen others, authorities said.

Jordanian Health Minister Ibrahim al-Budour reported Saturday that one critically injured patient was still hanging on at Prince Ali Military Hospital in unstable condition. Government spokesperson Mohammad Momani helpfully clarified that the attackers “subscribed to ‘extremist takfiri ideology,’” the worldview that treats anyone who doesn’t share a sufficiently rigid reading of Islam as an apostate fair game for execution. Groups like ISIS have found this framework useful for murdering Muslims, Christians, and Jews alike.

Karak has a noticeable Christian minority, so Momani made sure to stress that Christians are “part of Jordan’s national fabric”—a reminder that apparently still needs issuing after events like this, which is sure to keep the jihadis at bay.

Whether the shooters had formal ties to any named terrorist organization [in addition to Islam] remains unclear, and Jordanian authorities had not announced any arrests as of Saturday. Footage aired on Jordanian state television showed two gunmen with what looked like pistols approaching the church and opening fire, according to the Associated Press. A third man carrying what appeared to be a semiautomatic rifle joined them shortly afterward, and all three then moved toward the building.

Witness photos and video captured broken glass and pools of blood inside the church. Once police secured the scene, two bodies covered with blankets were visible outside.


Dorgham Halasa told the AP that intense gunfire broke out inside the church about 15 minutes after the funeral service started. People ran. Halasa said he did not see the gunmen himself, but others he spoke with described at least four attackers. Authorities had not confirmed the exact number as of Saturday.

King Abdullah II stated that Jordan will “confront the terrorist act that targeted Karak with the harshest penalties.” He continued: “Whoever imagines that the bullets of treachery can divide the ranks of Jordanians will fail in his endeavor before our steadfastness and unity. Our deepest condolences to the families of the martyrs, and our wishes for recovery to the wounded.”

The interior of a Greek Orthodox church hours after gunmen opened fire on Oct. 23, 2026. (AP Photo)

Jordan declared three days of national mourning, the state-run Petra News Agency reported.

The attack fits a pattern long familiar to anyone tracking Islamist violence against Christian communities in the region. Officials continue to describe the ideology as “extremist,” as though the problem is a narrow fringe rather than a recurring feature of certain doctrinal interpretations that treat non-adherents as legitimate targets. Maybe if they actually read the Qur'an, they might come to a different conclusion.


Jordan’s relative stability and the king’s response distinguish it from places where similar attacks have become routine and less vigorously condemned, but the underlying motive remains the one authorities themselves identified.

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Utah Anti-Semite With Fantasies of Blowing Up Synagogue Found With Homemade Bombs



Skyler AJ Rose did not exactly hide what he wanted to do. The 22-year-old dolt from Ogden, Utah, posted on social media that he wanted to bomb a synagogue and hunt Jews. A federal grand jury has now indicted him.

On December 23, 2025, the mouth-breather allegedly wrote, “I wanna blow up a synagogue.” That post, along with others, put him in the crosshairs of federal authorities. 

He now faces charges for possessing an unregistered destructive device, threatening to kill or injure people and destroy a building with an explosive, and attempting to commit a hate crime.

Assistant Attorney General Harmeet Dhillon said, “Today’s indictment stops in its tracks an alleged plan to carry out a violent attack on a synagogue.” She added, “The Department of Justice will take decisive action to protect American worshippers from violent threats, no matter where they occur.”

U.S. Attorney Melissa Holyoak laid it out plainly: “there is no place for hate‑motivated violence — attempts or otherwise — in our communities.” FBI Special Agent in Charge Robert Bohls said, “no one should have to fear for their safety because of their faith.”

After the December post, the FBI contacted Ogden police. A search of Rose’s place turned up six improvised explosive pipe bombs, one inert device, and parts to build more. His phone showed he had searched for a nearby synagogue back in November. 

The search also revealed that it contained images of child sexual abuse, which is much like a reflection of what some adult Muslim males do by marrying children because Mohammed did it first.

Rose was already on state probation when this happened. He had been charged in May 2025 with disorderly conduct after firing a homemade shotgun in public. That probation was revoked after the December arrest, and he faces additional state charges, according to KSL-TV.

Prosecutors noted the obvious problem in a court motion: “Despite having already been under state supervision for his previous dangerous conduct, [Rose] engaged in even more risky and dangerous criminal behavior.” They continued, “This recent history demonstrates that [Rose] does not respect court conditions and will not follow them, even if it is to his benefit to do so… [his] conduct is serious and inherently dangerous to the community and his history evidences no desire to act differently.”

But liberal courts being what they are, let him go free to do the devil's work.


The anti-Semitic posts went further. Rose allegedly wrote, “When the power goes out I must hunt the Jews,” and “Death be upon you Jews for I bring fire and brimstone.” Another post, reported by KSL, said, “Death to all Jews I will devote my life to killing you! heil hitler,” [sic and sick].

Prosecutors summed up what investigators found: “[Rose’s] troubling searches, combined with threatening social media posts and six functional improvised explosive pipe bombs are exacerbated by even more illegal material found on his phone. Specifically, law enforcement found hundreds of cached images and screenshots depicting [child sexual abuse material] when searching that device.”

The combination of explicit threats, functional bombs, and prior supervision that did not stop him is what landed him in federal court.

One has to wonder whether the cretin had help with the bomb making as he appears as bright as a black hole.

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Saturday, October 24, 2026

Omar deleted damning tweets that contain clues about bro marriage



WASHINGTON—In a wild development for genealogy nerds and crossword puzzle creators everywhere, a resurfaced 2013 social media post suggests that Representative Ilhan Omar’s family tree may actually be a complete circle.

According to a newly unearthed post from the archives, Omar wished her father a happy holiday using a name that bears a striking resemblance to the name of her former husband, Ahmed Nur Said Elmi. Naturally, critics are treating the revelation with the calm, understated nuance characteristic of modern political discourse.

"Happy Father’s Day to my aabo Nur Said, I am forever grateful to Allah for giving me the best father," Omar wrote in the June 2013 post before wisely memory-holing it on the morning of September 19, 2019.

[Can I get an al lou snackbar.]

Federal investigators are currently reviewing the Israel hating comrade's immigration and naturalization records after executing a search warrant on her Washington, D.C., residence. Meanwhile, defenders of the alleged fraudsterette insist that naming your father after your spouse is simply a rich cultural tradition that modern Westerners are too culturally insensitive to appreciate. And if you believe that balderdash, I have a dental bridge to sell you.

A statement allegedly from Omar’s spokesperson claimed that "Nur Said" was merely a childhood nickname and that the tweet was deleted only because the family received threats. But produce the treats, Omar's crew could not.


Skeptics, however, point out that keeping track of who's who in the family album becomes uniquely challenging when husband and father sound like contestants in a family reunion spelling bee.

When asked about federal court filings identifying her under the alias "Ilhan Nur Said Elmi," Omar offered absolute clarity.

"Ilhan Abdullahi Omar, you know it," Omar told reporters. "It’s Ilhan Abdullahi Omar."

Legal experts note that if investigators prove anyone knowingly used a false identity on federal immigration forms, it could technically violate federal law, which will possibly result in nothing substantial in the way of punishment.

Until then, political analysts predict the mystery will remain unsolved, much like the exact square footage of a family tree that doubles as a closed-loop highway.

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Friday, October 23, 2026

Israel orders total West Bank lockdown after IDF stop Hamas attack



To witness the reporting of events in Judea and Samaria [aka the West Bank] is to be reminded, once again, of the remarkably fragile architecture of modern existence. 

On Friday, following a brazen morning assault by two gunmen at a checkpoint in Hebron, an engagement that left five Israelis wounded, two of them critically, Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu ordered a full lockdown of the city and prepared for extensive security measures across the region.

The mechanics of the incident were as grimly familiar as they were swift.

Two Gazan scumcrumpets arrived by car at dawn, opened fire on Israel Defense Forces personnel, and sustained a twenty-minute firefight before being killed by vigilant commanders from the Ari Battalion and the Paratroopers Brigade. A subsequent search of their vehicle revealed a substantial cache of ammunition—a chilling indication of what security officials suspect was intended to be a mass-casualty atrocity.

In response, Netanyahu announced via social media that the state would take decisive action.

“I have instructed the IDF and security forces to immediately cordon off the city of Hebron and take additional security measures to prevent terrorist attacks originating from Judea and Samaria,” Bibi stated.

He later elaborated on the impending operations with sobering clarity:

“We will implement the offensive and successful model that we carried out in the refugee camps within the cities. The IDF will enter the neighborhoods from which the terrorists emerged, will evacuate the residents, will go house to house and destroy the terror infrastructure. We are ready for extensive action in Judea and Samaria.”

As the IDF and Shin Bet investigate whether the attackers acted as lone terrorists or as part of a wider conspiracy, the fundamental reality of the region remains unchanged. A democratic society is perpetually forced to balance the preservation of civilized life against the relentless, fanatical determination of those who seek its destruction.

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State Department Applauds President Trump as Paris Boards Up Its Windows


France's President Emmanuel Macron is currently learning a hard lesson in global governance: ignoring reality does not stop shop windows from being boarded up with plywood. Following a weekend where over 3,000 shops were looted and 2,500 people arrested across France, the U.S. State Department has officially declared that President Donald Trump was entirely correct in his assessment of the chaos.

Trump pointed out the obvious during a recent rally, stating that the nation is being "looted and burned to the ground by migrants, jihadists and communists who hate Christianity" and "the Western civilization itself." He added that "the migrants have taken over France" and that the country needs to finally secure its borders. Of course, he repeated each point at least three times, but that's Trump for ya.

Predictably, Paris reacted not by securing the streets, but by clutching its collective European pearls and having the vapors. 


Macron lashed out at foreign leaders, labeling their remarks "unacceptable and stupid comments" while whining about phantom AI-generated misinformation. He insisted that claims of the country being overrun by hordes of migrants are completely false.

State Department spokesperson Tommy Pigott gave a much-needed dose of common sense in response to Macron's temper tantrum, telling Fox News Digital that Trump "is on point as he is consistently on point."

"He has been clear about the dangers of mass migration for years, especially since the beginning of this administration, but certainly long beforehand as well. The president has secured the border on day one when it comes to the United States of America," Pigott said. "But we've also been clear from the State Department's perspective that we are going to oppose international institutions, for example, that seek to impose an agenda upon sovereign nations to encourage mass migration."

While European technocrats continue to lecture everyone else on utopian multiculturalism, the Louvre and major museums in Paris are shutting their doors in preparation for yet another weekend of civil unrest.


Pigott emphasized that open-border policies carry a heavy, undeniable price tag.

"Mass migration is inherently destabilizing. It is inherently destabilizing. It is something that we don't believe solves problems, but actually creates problems. And this is something the president has raised time and time again. He's raised it in reaction to these recent protests," Pigott added.

"He's also raised it directly to world leaders at the U.N. General Assembly. Two years in a row raising this issue, calling for an end to the destructive policies of illegal amassed migration. Illegal amassed migration that, by the way, only helps criminal cartel groups. That's something we see in our own hemisphere, for example," Pigott continued. "The fact that cartel groups have traveled along these migration pathways. So the president is spot on, he's bringing attention to this issue, he is taking action to address this issue and, from the State Department's perspective, we have also taken concrete action to end the era of mass migration."

Amid the burning barricades and shuttered storefronts, the State Department offered practical advice for any American citizens currently trapped in the European capital of lights and riots.


"One of things that we really stress to Americans is that when they're traveling abroad, if they could please register for the Smart Traveler Enrollment Program (STEP). That program lets you tell us which countries you're going to so that we can provide real-time information to Americans in the country that have registered," Pigott told Fox News Digital.

"Speaking generally, when it comes to Americans that need assistance, we have personnel across the world at the State Department, at embassies and consulates that are working 24/7 to help the American people. If you have an issue when you're abroad, please contact the embassy or consulate," he added. "There are people that are there to help you that can provide information. Everything from a lost passport to responses to a security situation, that is something that is hugely important and a huge factor for the State Department."

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Virginia Democrat Indicted In Alleged Marijuana Empire, Proving Public Service Can Be A Surprisingly Profitable Business



Virginia State Sen. Louise Lucas, one of the Commonwealth’s most powerful Democrats, has been indicted on federal racketeering, marijuana distribution, and money laundering conspiracy charges. Prosecutors allege that Lucas used her political influence to protect and enrich a cannabis business she co-owns, turning public office into a potentially lucrative side hustle.

Lucas, 82, surrendered to authorities Thursday, according to U.S. Attorney General Todd Blanche. Six others, including family members and close associates, were also taken into custody in connection with the alleged scheme. Apparently, the family business may have had a few more departments than the average operation.

The eight-count indictment accuses Lucas of racketeering conspiracy, conspiracy to distribute marijuana, money laundering conspiracy, honest services fraud conspiracy, and maintaining drug-involved premises. Additional defendants face firearms and wire fraud charges.

Lucas responded with the sort of defiant statement politicians typically reserve for moments when they would prefer the public to discuss anything other than the indictment.

“I grew up under Jim Crow. I’ve seen what happens when people in power try to silence those who stand up to them,” she wrote. “I spent my life fighting back, and I’m not stopping now. I will not be intimidated. I will not be bullied. And I will not back down.”

The timing is politically awkward, to put it mildly. The charges were unsealed just 12 days before the midterm elections, although Lucas herself is not on the ballot this year. The investigation reportedly began before the Trump administration, but that has done little to discourage Democrats from portraying the case as a politically motivated assault.

Blanche, however, insisted that the indictment was the product of evidence rather than partisan theater.

“We’re here today because of facts and evidence, which led to this investigation to begin many years ago, and facts and evidence that led to the grand jury to indict Senator Lucas and her alleged co-conspirators,” he said.

According to prosecutors, Lucas allegedly directed an organization dubbed the “Lucas Enterprise,” arranging the acquisition and distribution of at least 100 kilograms of marijuana while overseeing the laundering of its proceeds.

FBI Director Kash Patel said investigators believe the operation generated nearly $5 million over almost five years. That is an impressive return for an enterprise whose alleged business model supposedly involved cannabis rather than government-approved fiscal responsibility.

“The purpose of her enterprise included trafficking large quantities of illegal marijuana, creating generational wealth for members and associates of her criminal enterprise,” Patel said.

Prosecutors further allege that Lucas used her position as chair of Virginia’s Senate Finance and Appropriations Committee to shield the operation from criminal scrutiny and influence legislation that would benefit its business interests.

The arrangement, if proven, would represent an unusually direct relationship between writing the rules and profiting from the business those rules govern.

Virginia permits recreational marijuana possession and use, but commercial sales remain illegal outside the state’s authorized framework. Lawmakers passed legislation earlier this year establishing a regulated recreational marketplace scheduled to launch next summer. Prosecutors allege that Lucas and her associates were pursuing profits through an operation that went well beyond simply waiting for the legal market to open.

Blanche accused the senator of putting her own interests ahead of those of the people who elected her.

“Her first duty should have been looking out for her constituents before herself,” he said. “But the charges listed in the indictment reflect the alleged behavior of a public servant who put her own financial interests before the people she was elected to serve.”
An Alleged Family Business With Political Connections

According to Blanche, the alleged operation involved Lucas’ daughters, Lisa Lucas-Burke and Theresa Lucas-Lamb, and her grandson, Ryan Eichelberger, along with Carlton Upton Jr., Prince Albert William Hudson III, and Tamika Johnson.

Lucas and Lucas-Burke opened The Cannabis Outlet in Portsmouth in 2021. Prosecutors allege that Lucas-Lamb and Eichelberger acquired marijuana, supervised distribution, and managed the store as part of the enterprise.

Upton was Lucas’ business partner in VA Freedom Life, a company that served as an umbrella for The CBD Shoppe and The Cannabis Outlet beginning in 2019. Prosecutors allege that Upton managed The CBD Shoppe and worked with Lucas to obtain a recreational marijuana license that would benefit the enterprise.

The indictment also alleges that Upton made materially false statements on an April 2020 application for an Economic Injury Disaster Loan for Virginia Freedom Life. The government ultimately provided the business with $11,800.

That is a comparatively modest sum in a case involving millions of dollars in alleged proceeds, but apparently even a small federal loan can become an unwelcome detail when investigators start examining the paperwork.

Another allegation involves a $750,000 payment Lucas allegedly made in August 2022 to acquire full ownership of a business serving as a shell holding company for a co-conspirator’s anticipated Virginia recreational marijuana license.

Prosecutors say Lucas failed to disclose that financial interest on required forms. They further allege that she met with the co-conspirator in her Capitol complex office to receive a partial repayment and discussed the individual’s eligibility for a marijuana license with officials, including legislators, in connection with an alleged bribery arrangement.

In a November text message to the unnamed co-conspirator, Lucas allegedly wrote:

“Yes, we can make a lot of money but, before we start down that road again; how about we begin with you sending at least a good faith payment of the money you owe me with arrangements for the balance. Then we can talk about future business plans,”

Lucas had identified herself as president and CEO of VA Freedom Life on a February 2022 Statement of Economic Interests, according to prosecutors.

Patel described the alleged operation as one involving “recycling drug proceeds to expand the operation that she launched and created, and steering marijuana licenses to entities in which members held financial interest.”

The indictment also quotes Lucas discussing the possibility of an unnamed co-conspirator obtaining a recreational marijuana license and sharing the proceeds with her during a February 9, 2026, phone call about pending legislation.

Prosecutors allege that she described the opportunity as “our last chance at generational wealth” and said, “I’ve got too old to not be greedy.”

If the allegations are substantiated, the comments could prove more damaging than the usual campaign-trail promises about economic opportunity. Generational wealth is a popular political talking point. Prosecutors allege that Lucas was attempting to secure a particularly personal version of it.
Federal Agents Search Offices And Cannabis Businesses

The case became public on May 6, when federal agents searched Lucas’ Portsmouth legislative office and cannabis businesses. The Justice Department said agents recovered marijuana and firearms at The Cannabis Outlet and The CBD Shoppe.

FBI spokeswoman Cassandra Temple offered little detail at the scene, telling the Mercury: “We are conducting court-authorized law enforcement activity today.”

Fox News, which first reported the operation, said staff members were ordered out of Lucas’ office while agents conducted the search. Witnesses saw agents carrying boxes from the building. The network also reported that armed SWAT officers ordered people out of the neighboring Cannabis Outlet and that at least three people were handcuffed.

Lucas arrived after the operation had begun and told a reporter she did not know what it concerned.

Following the searches, Lucas accused federal authorities of political intimidation, arguing that the investigation was “about far more than one state senator” and reflected “a clear pattern from this administration.”

She also linked the raid to a redistricting referendum approved by Virginia voters in April, claiming the investigation was connected to efforts to “stop Trump’s scheme to manipulate the 2026 midterm elections.” The Supreme Court of Virginia later overturned the referendum.

“I am not backing down, and I will keep fighting for the people of Portsmouth and the commonwealth of Virginia,” she said.

Lucas has served in the Virginia Senate since 1992 and has been president pro tempore since 2020. As chair of the Senate Finance and Appropriations Committee, she wields substantial influence over the state budget, taxes, and spending.

Earlier this year, she pushed to eliminate or reduce sales and use tax exemptions for data centers, arguing that the incentives had become too expensive and were straining Virginia’s electricity grid and infrastructure. Opposition from House Democrats and Gov. Abigail Spanberger contributed to a months-long budget impasse.

The senator has spent decades exercising influence over how Virginia spends its money. Prosecutors now allege that she also used that influence to advance her own business interests.
Democrats Cry Foul Over Timing

The indictment has placed Virginia Democrats in the familiar position of defending a colleague’s right to due process while questioning the motives of the authorities bringing the charges.

Senate Majority Leader Scott Surovell, a Democrat from Fairfax, urged restraint.

“The federal indictment unsealed this week contains serious allegations, and Senator Lucas is entitled to the same presumption of innocence that every American receives,” Surovell said.

“She is innocent until proven guilty in a court of law. I will not comment on the evidence in this case, and I urge others to show the same restraint.”

Spanberger also emphasized Lucas’ presumption of innocence but argued that the timing of the indictment was troubling.

“She and her family deserve the opportunity to present their defense and speak to the allegations presented,” Spanberger said Thursday.

“The timing of this indictment undermines the U.S. Department of Justice’s previously longstanding policy of not taking legal actions — to include indictments or significant investigative steps — close to an election and sadly, this timing further erodes the trust the American people deserve to have in the Department of Justice.”


Virginia House Speaker Don Scott, another Democrat, likewise criticized the Trump administration while acknowledging the seriousness of the allegations.

“The Trump administration’s weaponization of the justice system is deeply troubling — as are the allegations made in this indictment,” Scott said. “Today we have heard only from the Trump administration, and Senator Lucas will have her chance to respond to these charges in court.”

Republican House Minority Leader Terry Kilgore took a more straightforward approach, arguing that the courts should settle the matter.

“The charges against Senator Lucas are serious, and go beyond the world of politics. They will be resolved via our judicial system, as they should,” Kilgore said.

The federal investigation is not the first time Lucas’ cannabis business has attracted scrutiny.

Lucas co-sponsored legislation legalizing simple marijuana possession in 2021. That measure did not, however, establish a regulated recreational retail market.

A 2022 Mercury investigation found labeling discrepancies and quantities of delta-9 THC that made two tested products from The Cannabis Outlet illegal to sell under Virginia law at the time. One cereal bar contained substantially less total THC than its packaging advertised. The reporting raised broader questions about unregulated cannabis products following the legalization of possession.

The latest indictment goes considerably further, alleging that Lucas used her political position to protect a business operation, facilitate marijuana distribution, and pursue financial arrangements tied to anticipated state licenses.

The allegations remain unproven, and Lucas is entitled to defend herself in court. But the case presents Virginia Democrats with an inconvenient problem: a powerful member of their own party is accused of using public office to benefit a private enterprise in an industry that lawmakers themselves have been working to regulate.

As for Lucas’ future role in the Senate and the upcoming legislative session, those questions remained unresolved following Thursday’s indictment.

For now, the courts will determine whether prosecutors can substantiate their claims. If they do, Virginia may have a case study in the dangers of allowing politicians to regulate an industry in which they have substantial personal financial interests.

The phrase “conflict of interest” may soon require a much larger definition in Richmond.


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Thursday, October 22, 2026

BREAKING: Omar isn't Ilhan's real name: DOJ filing


WASHINGTON—In what federal prosecutors assure us is just a routine exercise of bureaucratic paperwork and definitely not a deep dive into an episode of 'Maury', the Department of Justice revealed in a new court filing that Representative Ilhan Omar (Anti-Semite) answers to an alias matching her former spouse, who is also very possibly her brother based on damning evidence.

The DOJ filed a motion asking a judge to stall on unsealing the search warrant from last week's raid on her Washington, D.C., residence. According to prosecutors, federal agents simply have too many boxes of documents left to sift through before they can share the details with the fourteen news organizations demanding transparency.

Naturally, the filing dropped a casual plot twist that left political pundits moist. Prosecutors referred to the Minnesota Democrat as "Ilhan Nur Said Elmi, aka Ilhan Abdullahi Omar," leaving out any explanation for the alternate moniker and giving immigration historians a fresh batch of mysteries to solve.

The October 12 raid followed an earlier seizure of a phone belonging to Omar's sister, Sahra Noor, a woman who, in her book "Salt in the Snow" as well as related interviews, described America’s “insidious” relationship with race and the imposition of binary racial labels at the border. 

Investigators are reportedly hunting for the original paperwork Omar and her father completed upon entering the United States, as well as looking into potential immigration fraud. [Babylon Bee said that Omar didn't marry her brother for immigration purposes, but out of love.] 

Omar maintains she became a U.S. citizen at age 17 when her father supposedly became a naturalized citizen in 2000. However, critics have pointed out that congressional staff conveniently changed her birth year from 1981 to 1982 in official directories. Under the laws of that era, the math dictates whether she actually qualified for citizenship through her father, assuming investigators can find any trace of his naturalization records, which a 2023 search failed to turn up. Meanwhile, there are no records that her now dead father ever was a naturalized citizen.

Investigative reporting previously uncovered that Omar’s father, Nur Omar Mohamed, served as a colonel under Somalian communist dictator Siad Barre, a detail that somehow got left out of her descriptions of him as a humble educator. [Not so Fun Fact: Under that regime, over 200,000 Somalis were slaughtered.]

Homeland Security agents reportedly hauled away electronics and documents from the home. Omar is now demanding her passport and computers back, insisting the entire probe is politically motivated and that President Trump is weaponizing the federal government against her.

Naturally, the congresswoman addressed the crisis on Wednesday by releasing a tearful video begging supporters for cash, pretending to be broke. [It's rumored that she yanked out a nose hair in order to induce her tears.]

“It is going to be a very expensive and challenging time,” she said, asking for zakath of $5, $10, or $20, or pay a jizya, if you happen to be non-Muslim.

Records indicate the investigation into her finances and dealings actually kicked off during the Biden administration in 2024, proving that even friendly administrations sometimes lose track of bureaucratic housekeeping.

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Mamdani's Spanish language video sparks calls of treason

Smells his own flatulence Behold the utopia of Greater Gotham, where the municipal government is now officially a wholly-owned subsidiary of...