Southwest Airlines will now handle the spread of wide bodies

Cheap-seats carrier Southwest Airlines has won the kudos by "passengers of size" on TikTok after they looked up from their meals to discover that they can now request complimentary seats--one or two, depending on their adipose tissue situation--to accommodate their zaftig proportions. 

Customers whose bodies are so obese and unhealthy that they sag beyond the armrest are entitled to an extra seat, according to the carrier's inclusion policy likely designed by a portly person. Southwest is one of the few, if not the only, airlines to offer free seats to larger passengers but still refuse to offer free meals to the same victims of an adipose tissue situation.

Southwest provided its policy to Fox Business which said that passengers of size "have the option of purchasing just one seat and then discussing your seating needs with the Customer Service Agent at the departure gate [after leaving the nearby restaurant]. If it’s determined that a second (or third) seat is needed, you’ll be accommodated with a complimentary additional seat." 

If a fourth seat is needed, the airline will provide these passengers with a gastroenterologist. 

The flight team will then try to effort to make the seating arrangements, potentially moving other passengers around for the "unplanned accommodation" whether or not they agree to sit elsewhere and leave young children to fend for themselves.

Alternatively, customers can purchase extra seats in advance and then contact Southwest "for a refund of the cost of additional seating after travel."

The policy states, "Customers who encroach upon any part of the neighboring seat(s) may proactively purchase the needed number of seats prior to travel to ensure the additional seat(s) is available… The purchase of additional seats serves as a notification of a special seating need and allows us to adequately plan for the number of occupied seats onboard."

An unhealthy obese travel expert and TikToker, Jae'lynn Chaney, told Fox News Digital it was an important move to include people in the "super fat" category.

A self-described "Fat Solo Traveler" posted a video on TikTok that went viral, obtaining nearly 1,000,000 views since October, showing how she got a complimentary seat. We are not sure but some are guessing that it's the person pictured below.

"Super fat is how we identify," Chaney, business owner of Jae Bae Productions, said. "There's a spectrum of fatness. And as a super fat individual, you start needing different accommodations… I just felt really happy that there was something like this for people."

"I hope to see more airlines implement customer-of-size policies. The Southwest customer size policy helps many travelers offset the disproportionate costs that we incur because of needing extra room. And so, it's not just about physical accessibility. It's also about financial accessibility." 

Super fat TikTokers who have recently discovered the policy have amassed hundreds of thousands of views on the platform showing themselves waddling up to Southwest Airlines employees and successfully nailing down their extra seat(s) on Southwest flights free of charge.

Some healthy average size people are trying to convince Southwest that they identify as "super fat," but so far the airline refuses to honor their feigned mental illness.

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Buttigieg in September: airline issues would "get better" by holidays

Transportation Secretary Peter Buttigieg said in September that he was increasing pressure on airlines. He told this to insomniacs who stay up late to watch "The Late Late Show with James Corden."

Well, that didn't work out so well for travelers over the Christmas holidays as many thousands were stranded at airports while Pete chest-fed his baby as his husband sat by proudly watching. [Just kidding--men can't chest-feed because they aren't women, the only gender who can.]

Now he's being blasted for his response to the airline clusterfrack after assuring Americans that air travel issues would improve before the holidays, proving talk is cheap and that he got the job mainly because he's gay.

In the September TV appearance Buttigieg said he was increasing pressure on U.S. airlines after travelers experienced an expensive and chaotic summer.

"I think it's gonna get better by the holidays," the incompetent clueless transportation secretary said at the time. "We’re really pressing the airlines to deliver better service. So many people have been delayed, been canceled, it happened to me several times this summer. And the fact is they need to be ready to service the tickets that they're selling."

"If you've ever been mistreated by an airline, if they haven't given you the refund they owe you, if they haven't lived up to their customer service obligations, we will have your back," he claimed. "We went from zero of the top 10 airlines committing that they're going to provide a meal or hotel, for example, to eight out of 10 doing it. So we're pushing them."

This week, Buttigieg called on Southwest Airlines to fully compensate customers for travel, meal and lodging expenses after thousands of flights were canceled and travelers were left stranded at airports over the holidays.

Buttigieg is taking heat from both sides of the political aisle over the situation and his inability to handle it.

Rep. Nancy Mace (R-SC) told Sean Hannity that Buttigieg should increase pressure on Southwest Airlines and audit to see how billions in taxpayer-funded relief the company received was spent. She explained that her role on the House Transportation and Infrastructure Committee was a main reason to her need in finding answers to the problem as well as the fact that her own kids were stranded at BWI Airport in Baltimore on Christmas Eve.

"[T]his hit close to home, because my kids my teenage kids got stranded in Baltimore trying to make it home on Christmas Eve. And even today, five days later, we still don't know where their luggage is right now," she said. "And so we've been personally impacted by this."

Isn't it always most important to politicians when they are directly affected by the policies they voted for? Had this happened to Pete Buttigieg's husband, things would likely have been different.

Beth Van Duyne (R-TX), agreed with Mace's sentiments, asserting to Hannity that Buttigieg is unqualified to serve in his current role, pointing to the supply chain crisis early in his tenure, [and the unfilled potholes in South Bend, Indiana where he was mayor].

"Earlier this year, we had the rail strike potential looming over us," Van Duyne said. "We were going to have, again, I mean, a massive amount of hit to our economy. You're going to have municipalities that couldn't get chemicals to be able to treat their water supply. And where was Pete? Oh, that's right. He was on a family vacation in Portugal."

"This is a man who was not qualified for the job, has never really been on the job," she added. "And we've trusted him with $1.2 trillion worth of taxpayer dollars."

The Alfred E. Neuman 'what, me worry?' impersonator was warned by Democrats in his own party about concerns within the airline industry before Southwest’s mass cancelations. 

"The problems at Southwest Airlines over the last several days go beyond weather," Sen. Maria Cantwell, (D-WA) the chair of the Senate Commerce Committee on Commerce, said in a statement Tuesday. "The committee will be looking into the causes of these disruptions and its impact to consumers."

Cantwell, along with Democratic Sens. Ed Markey (D-MA) and stolen valor perpetrator Richard Blumenthal (D-CT) filed a comment in November to the Department of Transportation on the need to hurry its process to finalize a rule to ensure that consumers are properly refunded for cancelations and get accommodations.

In August, a bipartisan group of 38 state attorneys general wrote to Congress saying that Buttigieg was failing to adequately respond to airline consumer complaints, and they asked for legislation to allow states to enforce federal consumer protection laws.

"Americans are justifiably frustrated that federal government agencies charged with overseeing airline consumer protection are unable or unwilling to hold the airline industry accountable and to swiftly investigate complaints submitted to the US DOT," read the letter signed by Arizona’s Mark Brnovic, New York’s Letitia James and others.

The Senate Commerce Committee stated that it would investigate Southwest for the cancelations, but not Pete Buttigieg because he falls into a victim status category. 

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Female pilot suing Southwest Airline for retaliating about reporting another pilot for stripping in cockpit

Southwest Airlines pilot Christine Janning is suing the company, her union and a former colleague who pleaded guilty in 2021 for locking the cockpit door during a flight and changing into his birthday suit in front of her.

Janning report Michael Haak to Southwest and the FBI, but the company kept Haak on despite his alleged history of sexual misconduct, and the company managers denigrated her in memos.

She also alleges that the Southwest Airlines Pilots Association conspired with the airline and refused to support her. She is suing Haak for sexual assault, and he pleaded guilty last year to a federal misdemeanor charge of committing a lewd, indecent or obscene act, to which he was sentence to probation.

Haak's lawyer, Michael Salnick, said Wednesday that his client got naked only because Janning encouraged him to do so and said he never did anything else [such as wave 'Mister Doodles' at he or touch her inappropriately]. Salnick also mentioned that there had been no prior incidents by Haak.

Southwest said it supported Janning and that it would "vigorously defend" itself against the lawsuit. The union did not respond to a phone call seeking comment. Although the media generally doesn't publicize the names of sex crime victims, Janning, through her attorney, agreed to use her name.

The lawsuit, filed last week in Orange County, Florida states that Janning had not met Haak before August 2020, when she was his first officer on a flight from Philadelphia to Orlando. She claims Haak, a 27-year veteran of Southwest, had used his seniority right the previous day to bump another pilot who was scheduled to captain the flight, but she believes he did so because he saw that his first officer was a woman.

Janning said that when they reached cruising altitude, Haak told her this was his final flight and there was something he wanted to do before retirement. So he allegedly bolted the cockpit door, put the aircraft on autopilot, stripped off his clothes and began watching pornography on his laptop. Then he apparently began cuffing the carrot for a half hour while taking photos and videos of himself.

Haak's shyster lawyer, Salnick, claimed that it was Janning who asked Haak if there was anything he wanted to do before retiring, implying, of course, that she was making him a sexual offer. He said Haak rejected those and also denied Haak ever went into manual override.

But think about it--she didn't know him, was his subordinate, and also has no history of sexual improprieties. So the probability of her making advances on him seem rather remote.

At his sentencing hearing last year, Haak called the incident "a consensual prank" that got out of hand [no pun intended].

Of course, Janning's attorney, Frank Podesta, denied she encouraged Haak or made any advances.

Janning said in the lawsuit that she was "horrified," but she kept flying the plane while taking photos "to create a record." The plane landed safely.

And that wasn’t Haak’s final flight — he flew for three more weeks.

Unfortunately, Janning didn’t report the incident to a Southwest employee relations investigator until three months later. She said she waited because her boss had previously disparaged her to a male colleague. She said she asked the investigator not to inform her boss, but she did.

Janning said she was soon told that because Haak had retired, the airline's investigation was closed. She decided to go to the FBI and Haak was charged. Janning claims the company had sent Haak to a sexual harassment counseling center in Montreal after an incident in 2008 involving a flight attendant, but Salnick claims the incident never happened and his client was never sent for counseling.

"This person will do and say whatever is necessary to obtain a financial windfall. I feel sorry for her," Salnick, who doesn't like money, said.

Janning said as retaliation for the FBI report, she was grounded for more than three months, costing her part of her salary. She was then required to take "unnecessary" flight simulator training before she could work again. Personally, I believe that the company requiring her to take the simulator training after being grounded for that period of time was actually a good idea.

She also said that on the day she was grounded, the airline stranded her in Denver and the FBI had to book her a United Airlines flight so she could return home to Florida. She said a Southwest manager sent a memo to more than 25 employees "that made baseless allegations" about her flying competency.

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Southwest denied Janning's allegations, saying "we immediately supported (Janning) by cooperating with the appropriate outside agencies as they investigated."

"Our corporate Culture is built upon treating others with mutual respect and dignity, and the events alleged in this situation are inconsistent with the behavior that we require of our Employees," the statement read.

No hearings have been scheduled to date.

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Airline passenger gets jail time for masturbating mid-flight and it wasn't Jeff Toobin

A Southwest Airlines passenger who was buffin' the muffin four times during a flight pled guilty to a charge of indecent, or obscene acts while on an aircraft and was sentenced to 48 days in prison where he hopes to have more privacy than on an airplane. Also, Southwest has banned him for life and now he will have to fly the friendlier skies of another airline.

Antonio Sherrodd McGarity, 34, flicked the bean four times with his twig and berries exposed as he and the boys flew from Washington to Arizona on April 2nd, as the federal criminal complaint states. In addition to his short sentence, among other things, he will receive one year of probation.

The unlucky passenger sitting next to the bishop polisher reported the incident to a flight attendant, who then contacted Phoenix Police and the Federal Bureau of Investigations, according to the Department of Justice.

When the plane landed, the pickle painter was arrested. Not surprisingly, McGarity has a few other state and local convictions for lewd behavior.

McGarity allegedly waited until the plane had taken off before exposing himself, according to the complaint. The woman sitting next to the individual in seat 11E took pictures of the incident and complained to a flight attendant, and switched seats. She may have later planned to sell the photos online to Brian Stelter but that is not confirmed by Brain Flushings.

The female passenger told the Phoenix Police Department that McGarity masturbated "on four separate occasions using both his left and right hands," the court record shows. According to Kinsey et al. ambidextrous masturbators are not as rare as one might think, if one thinks about those sort of things. It was found that some masturbators prefer to use their non-dominant hand to provide the illusion that someone else is in manual override.

Evidence that Jeff Toobin is a lefty

A spokesperson for Southwest Airlines previously said that crew members on the flight took action when they were informed that the individual was pleasuring himself while flipping through photos of the Squad and Nancy Pelosi.

"We immediately placed the passenger who exhibited the lewd behavior on our No-Fly List, resulting in a lifetime ban from traveling on Southwest Airlines," the spokesperson said. "We washed our hands of him and hope other airlines will do the same."

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McGarity admitted that he reached orgasm on the flight and believed the woman next to him didn't mind. "She was snapping photos like crazy and there was a strange expression on her face which I interpreted to mean that she was okay with it."

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Fake You Leftist Hypocrites With Your Strategic Outrage Over "Let's Go Brandon!"

"Let's go Brandon!"

A pilot on Southwest Airlines allegedly said over the intercom "Let's go Brandon" and an alleged reporter for the Associated Press got the vapors and tried to enter the cockpit of the aircraft, possibly to wag a finger at said pilot and berate him if this really happened in the first place. She said that she was nearly kicked off the plane [for breaking federal law].

The media hearing about this story from the so-called reporter who almost had to be taken to the ICU compared the slogan "Let's Go Brandon!" to an ISIS sympathizer and many voiced outrage over the vulgarity of the name Brandon and what it now stands for. 

The chant "Let's Go Brandon!" became an internet sensation in September after an alleged reporter for NBC at a NASCAR Xfinity Series race claimed the crowd, that was clearly chanting "F**k Joe Biden!" was actually chanting "Let's Go Brandon" following the win by Brandon Brown.

"This is, I think, a witty and funny viral take on the media’s dishonesty that they tell us something that is clearly not true that we can see with our own eyes, and that is why I think it’s so popular with so many people," Outkick founder Clay Travis said on Monday on "America’s Newsroom."

Soon after the race, jokes and memes went viral and spread across the nation while the legacy media had to work fast to support their candidate and current co-President, Francis Joseph Biden [aka F. Joe Biden]. Now the "Let's Go Brandon!" chant is everywhere as Biden's poll numbers sag lower than his chin when he got caught napping at the G20 climate joke. 

The chant "Let's Go Brandon!" has made the left even crazier and angrier than normal. They tweeted, they shouted, they wrote columns and voiced hot takes by pundits calling the chant "vulgar" and offensive. But it's only offensive when it's their guy being mocked.

Alleged reporters for the Washington Post, Ashley Parker and Carissa Wolf wrote about what they considered "vitriol" from Biden critics in a piece titled "Biden’s critics hurl increasingly vulgar taunts."

The article claimed, "The current eruption of anti-Biden signs and chants, however, is on another level, far more vulgar and widespread" than anything seen in previous administrations. [Italics mine.]

Oh my, oh my, get me some smelling salts.

Not so ironically, but clearly hypocritically, these same leftists cheered when their fellow leftist used actual vulgarity to attack former President Donald Trump--the guy from the previous administration.

Take the aging actor Robert de Niro, for example. Hollywood stood and cheered for him at the Tony Awards when he twice proudly said "f**k Trump." 

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Leftists also cheered Kathy Griffin when she was photographed with the likeness of President Trump's severed head--they showed no outrage at all and she later claimed to be the victim when conservatives and Trump supporters called her out for her vulgar display. Other leftists also threatened to blow up the White House and posed with a mock severed head of Trump and even celebrated his fictional assassination in a poor adaptation of Shakespeare's "Julius Caesar."

CNN has also complained about the chant on air when Democratic "political analyst" and New York Times writer, Maggie Haberman, spoke somberly about South Carolina Republican Congressman Jeff Duncan wearing a mask with the "Let’s Go Brandon" phrase on it.

"There's nothing serious about this. This is literally done so that he will get attention. And it's working. ..." Yes, Maggie; that's the point. He's a politician, you're a hack.

Also on "New Day," CNN’s John Avalon called the chant "trollish" and "not patriotic."

But it wasn't 'trollish' and 'not patriotic' when last June, Los Angeles magazine had an entire article about an art show whose theme was F**k Trump art. That did not cause mental harm on the left nor any consternation by the hordes of hypocrites who went ballistic over "Let's Go Brandon1"

However, a pilot on Southwest Airlines was able to cause "reporters" to freak out and have a cow just for saying those words: "Let's Go Brandon!"

Nobody in their right mind would freak out hearing someone from the old West say, "Dagnabbit." That's because he isn't saying "G-d d**nit." It's a substitute and is used to remove the vulgarity or offensiveness of the term it substitutes. 

So Fake You, leftists for your fake outrage and your fake moral superiority. You can all go to H-E-double hockey sticks!

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