House Passes Bipartisan Resolution To Throw Rashida Tlaib's Latest Anti-Israel Tantrum In The Congressional Trash

WASHINGTON—In a development so shocking it briefly caused Capitol Hill to malfunction like a government website on tax day, the House of Representatives actually accomplished something useful Tuesday. Democrats and Republicans united in rare harmony to take the anti-Semitic Rep. Rashida Tlaib's latest anti-Israel performance art piece, escort it gently but firmly to the nearest legislative Port-o-Potty, and set it on fire.

Tlaib's war powers resolution, aimed at handcuffing U.S. military involvement in Lebanon, went down in a solid bipartisan 235-189 vote. Twenty-two Democrats bravely jumped ship from the Michigan congresswoman, joining nearly every Republican in opposition. 

In Washington terms, that's the equivalent of the entire room agreeing the fire alarm isn't just another progressive policy proposal.

The measure would have banned U.S. forces from any "hostilities" in Lebanon, a pressing issue if America were, you know, actually fighting there. But facts remain stubbornly uncooperative with Tlaib's worldview, i.e., that the Jewish state needs to be eliminated.

One lonely Republican dissenter was the execrable Rep. Thomas Massie of Kentucky, whose foreign policy instincts continue to spin wildly like a compass next to an industrial magnet. Time to vote him out.

Michigan's premier anti-Israel activist cosplaying as a member of Congress tried to limit military authority in a nation where America isn't conducting combat operations. It's roughly as urgent as demanding emergency legislation to stop astronauts from invading Saskatchewan.

House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries and most Democrats voted to tie President Donald Trump's hands on using force in Lebanon without congressional permission. Of course, Jeffries had opposed an earlier version of Tlaib's scheme, proving once again that consistency in the Democratic Party is treated like an optional accessory, right next to "supporting the troops."

The whole thing was a concurrent resolution, carrying all the legal weight of a strongly worded Facebook post. Even if it passed, it would never have reached President Trump's desk for a signature, veto, or well-deserved eye-roll.

Tlaib, Congress's only Palestinian American member and Israel's most dedicated congressional tormentor, has spent years accusing the Jewish state of "ethnic cleansing" in Gaza and Lebanon. Republicans correctly note that her laser focus on condemning Israel while giving Hezbollah a rhetorical free pass amounts to providing comfort to an Iranian-backed terrorist outfit.

Strangely missing from Tlaib's resolution was any condemnation of Hezbollah, the terror group that has spent years rocketing Israeli civilians and turning southern Lebanon into its personal launchpad. Apparently the actual people firing rockets at school buses deserve less congressional attention than the country daring to defend itself.

Earlier this month, Tlaib pushed an even broader version that critics said could have forced U.S. personnel guarding the American Embassy to abandon their posts and crippled aid to the Lebanese Armed Forces fighting actual terrorists. Even by Washington standards, siding against the non-terrorist side is a special kind of genius.

After that flop, she rolled out a revised version with polite exemptions for diplomatic security and training Lebanese troops. Nothing says "principled stand" like frantically editing your legislation after everyone reads the first draft and recoils in horror.

Republicans rightly wondered why Congress was wasting time stopping a war America isn't fighting.

"There are not U.S. combat forces conducting operations or engaged in hostilities in Lebanon," House Foreign Affairs Committee Chairman Brian Mast, (R-FL), said during debate. "They are training the Lebanese Armed Forces."

"Why are they training?" Mast continued. "Because there's probably at least 40,000, probably more, Hezbollah terrorists spread across the South of Lebanon that are actively engaged in targeting Israel and have been doing so for many years."

Brian Mast

Mast went further, correctly labeling supporters of the resolution as "proxies for Hezbollah," a remark unlikely to earn him a Christmas card from the Squad.

Ranking Member Gregory Meeks (D-NY), defended the pointless exercise by claiming it would prevent America from entering "another forever war that is not in our national interest."

A noble thought, if only the United States were actually in a war in Lebanon. Instead, Congress spent the afternoon solemnly debating how to stop a ghost from invading a house it never entered, while Hezbollah kept doing what it does best: trying to annihilate Israel and counting on enough useful idiots in Washington to stay distracted by imaginary American aggression. 

At least this time, sanity prevailed. Barely.

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Congress Forced To Pause Entire Government After Rashida Tlaib Suffers Severe Emotional Damage From Mean Words

Tlaib famously able to touch her nose with her lips

WASHINGTON, D.C. — The U.S. House of Representatives was thrown into a veritable clusterfrack this week after Rep. Rashida Tlaib (D-MI), reportedly suffered a critical outbreak of democracy when Rep. Max Miller (R-OH), said things out loud that weren’t pre-approved by congressional sensitivity coordinators.

The dramatic scene unfolded during debate over a Lebanon war powers resolution, where Tlaib accused Israel of committing atrocities while demanding the United States stop supporting America’s closest ally in the Middle East.

"We must end U.S. participation in the Israeli apartheid regime’s invasion of Lebanon. The Israeli military continues to target journalists like Amal Khalil and use our tax dollars to commit war crimes," said Tlaib.

At that point, Miller apparently made the grave error of responding.

"Its members are butchers that you like to hang out with to a certain extent," charged Miller. "Yes, you advocate for terrorists on a daily basis. You advocate for a terrorist regime every single day."

Witnesses say the Capitol immediately entered DEFCON 1 after a Republican criticized a Democrat too directly.

Tlaib reportedly shouted across the chamber, though congressional stenographers were unable to translate the remarks because they were delivered at the frequency usually associated with malfunctioning smoke detectors.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Are we getting a little emotional?" chided Miller.

Congressional sources confirmed this sentence caused more destruction to the institution than the national debt, insider trading, and 40 years of continuing resolutions combined.

Rep. Jay Obernolte (R-CA) desperately attempted to restore order before the House descended into full therapy session.

"Colleagues, this is a serious topic. We will debate it respectfully and deliberately," admonished Obernolte.

Tlaib then invoked the sacred congressional ritual known as "words taken down," a process originally created so lawmakers could survive exposure to opposing opinions.

"Yes, Mr. Speaker, I am. That is a direct attack on my character. I please request to strike the words down," said Tlaib.

The House immediately suspended all legislative activity while officials launched an emergency investigation into whether anyone’s feelings had been insufficiently validated.

For nearly an hour, Congress halted debate, amendments, and votes to determine whether Miller’s remarks violated the chamber’s strict rules prohibiting members from saying what everyone just heard them say.

Eventually, Obernolte ruled against Miller.

"The words of the gentleman from Ohio contain an allegation that the gentlewoman from Michigan is a ‘butcher’ and affiliated with a terrorist organization," said Obernolte. "Such remarks impugn the patriotism and loyalty of the member of the House."

The ruling effectively sentenced Miller to congressional solitary confinement for the remainder of the day, though lawmakers noted that punishment still falls short of forcing him to watch MSNBC.

But Republicans were not backing down.

House Foreign Affairs Committee Chairman Brian Mast (R-FL) delivered a message from Miller after House leadership confiscated his speaking privileges like a middle-school principal taking away a vape pen.

"‘Yes, I said it. I own it. And I stand by it,’" Mast declared.

Mast then attempted to enter articles regarding Tlaib’s alleged associations into the congressional record, but Tlaib objected faster than CNN fact-checkers during a Trump speech.

Meanwhile, lawmakers also discussed whether artificial intelligence could someday referee congressional disputes.

"AI is actually very good at this," said Obernolte. "You give it a rules manual and then you give it a specific instance and say ‘Is this in compliance with rules or is this a violation of the rules?’"

Experts agreed Congress would likely embrace AI immediately once they discovered it could automatically censor Republicans without requiring overtime from parliamentary staff.

At press time, House Democrats were reportedly drafting new rules prohibiting "microaggressions," "hostile eye contact," and "excessive disagreement."

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House GOP disembowels leftist Dems skipping Netanyahu speech

The Arab world's problems are a problem of the Arab mind, and the name for that problem is anti-Semitism--Bret Stephens 

There are [Warning: next word to follow is an oxymoron] progressive Democrats who are threatening to attend Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu's speech at next month's joint session of Congress, and House Republicans are going hard against these selective misanthropes. It isn't like they'll be missed or make Bibi Netanyahu feel upset by their absence; it's just that it makes the Democrats look like the Party of Fools.

Netanyahu's address is expected to be delivered by July 24 while the Jewish State continues to fight terrorists in Gaza.

There are a number of Democrats upset with Israel for not allowing Hamas to kill them. They are also upset that when Hamas hid Jewish hostages among the Gaza Arabs and Israel rescued the hostages, a number of Arabs were killed in the process. Not surprisingly, even the BBC was upset that Israel didn't warn the terrorists that they would be coming to get their people and there might be some violence. After all, just because Hamas forgot to warn the young people at the Nova music festival that they were coming to kill them, rape and mutilate them, and take hundreds of them as hostages, is no reason the Jews should get a free pass.

Anyway, several Democrats have said they would boycott Bibi's address in protest of Israel having the audacity to be winning the war they didn't start. For some reason, this didn't sit well with the Grand Old Party.

The No. 3 House GOP leader, Majority Whip Tom Emmer (R-MN), labeled Democrats "the anti-Israel party" in a statement to Fox News Digital.

"Their threats to boycott Prime Minister Netanyahu’s Joint Address is another notch on their long list of betrayals of our strongest ally in the Middle East," Emmer said.

Rep. Nick Langworthy (R-NY), called the would-be boycotters "apologists for terrorism," adding, "Their refusal to stand with our closest ally in the Middle East emboldens murderers and extremists who seek to destroy democracy and freedom worldwide."

Army combat veteran Rep. Brian Mast (R-FL), who led the House GOP's effort to sanction the International Criminal Court for threatening to go after Netanyahu, said of the Democrats' boycott, "Too bad they don't seem to care about the six Americans being held hostage by Hamas in Gaza as much as they care about establishing a Palestinian state."

Historically, Palestine was a Jewish state but the term was stolen by the scumwafer Yassar Arafat in order to give legitimacy to the Jordan Arabs who occupied it in the second half of the Twentieth Century.

Perhaps the most powerful Republican Representative was Mike Garcia (R-CA), a retired Navy pilot, told Fox News Digital that the speech would only be "a ’controversial' or 'counterproductive' speech" if Israel’s Democratic critics "make it one."

"There’s nothing controversial about allowing the elected leader of America’s greatest ally – who’s in the middle of a war against… U.S.-designated terrorists – speak to the Congress that’s funding and supporting Israel’s fight for survival," Garcia said.

There were many more responses but you get the picture. The Democrats have always pretended to be the virtuous Party, but they never were.

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CNN's Jake Tapper questions legless vet on his commitment to democracy

Comedy News Network's Jake Tapper used to be a journalist. He is now an ass clown who has no self-awareness, as is the wont of ass clowns. 

On Wednesday, Tapper questioned the loyalty of Rep. Brian Mast (R-FL) who lost both his legs in 2010 in Afghanistan while serving as an explosive ordnance disposal technician for the United States Army in Operation Enduring Freedom. 

Tapper never served in the military but knows of the dangers of war because he wrote words about it and thus, he is loyal to American democracy.

Mast spoke at the House impeachment debate and asked whether any of the rioters who breached the Capitol on Jan. 6th had been called before Congress to say if their behavior was carried out "because of our President."

Tapper's remarks came during a broader discussion about the GOP House members who planned to vote against impeachment of Trump, a mere week before his term was over, as to whether Trump fomented the attack on the U.S. Capitol building.

“The other thing I think is really, really important is the fact that we have video,” said CNN's Democrat apologist Dana Bash, referring to evidence showing that Trump actually did inspire the Capitol riot, "and I was just watching it as they were starting this [impeachment vote in the House], of the people who were storming the Capitol saying, ‘The president told us to come here.’”

Yes, Trump did tell them to come to the Capitol, but if you saw the entire video you would see and hear Trump tell them to protest "peacefully" and "patriotically." He may have said other things he shouldn't have said, but clearly, he was not calling for violence.

"Technically, one of the rioters reportedly said, “Our president wants us here,” while another was recorded saying, “We were invited by the president of the United States,” but let’s not quibble."

“Right,” Tapper said scornfully.

“There is video of this,” Bash continued, “just exhibit ‘A’ of the reams of evidence that we have.”

“One other thing,” Tapper, the former journalist, interrupted, “what you're saying is relevant because congressman Brian Mast, a Republican from Florida, who lost his legs, by the way, fighting for democracy abroad, although I don't know what his – I don't know about his commitment to it here in the United States, he said, ‘Did anybody say that?’”

Disloyal American?

Mast did not say that. Rather, Mast asked if any of the rioters had been asked to testify about whether they attacked the Capitol building at the behest of President Trump. That would be evidence that might be impeachable.

Mast's words on the floor of the House: “I rise with a very simple question. On Jan. 6, thousands of people broke the law by taking siege of our Capitol here with us inside. Has any one of those persons who brought violence on our Capitol been brought here to say whether they did that because of our president?”

No less than 30 seconds of silence followed his question.

“It appears I will receive no answer,” the congressman concluded.

But the former journalist stuck to his fantasy of the events.

“Yes,” Tapper said in response to a question Mast did not ask, “we heard them.”

Sure, Mast was wrong about what the rioters said last week. That doesn't excuse Jake Tapper to use Mast's remarks to question his loyalty and dedication to the country that he served honorably for over ten years in the Army. The only thing Tapper has served is himself.

Jake Tapper is an ass clown working for an ass clown outlet that sees the news as performance theater.

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