Michael Cohen begs Biden for pardon: "I'm somebody's son too"

Former Trump shyster lawyer Michael Cohen is asking President Biden to pardon him, just like he pardoned his son Hunter, before Trump takes office.

Cohen talked about his attempts to get a pardon from the Biden administration on MSNBC's "The Weekend" on Saturday morning. He said that not receiving a pardon would leave him "in danger" of being prosecuted by Trump and becoming someone's 'prison b***h." 

Cohen argued that Biden should protect him and other Trump critics, similar to how he lied and protected his crackhead son Hunter.

"Yeah, I put in the application for a presidential pardon because I believe that Joe Biden has the same responsibility to me that he had to his own son," Cohen whined. "And I would expect that the same exact pardon that he gave his son has to go to me and to anybody else that’s on that enemies list, whether they want it or not, because I assure you, solitary confinement, where I did 51 days, sucks."

MSNBC host Symone Sanders and former national press secretary for comrade Bernie Sanders in his 2016 presidential campaign that was handed to Hillary Clinton by the DNC,  agreed with Cohen about the risks of being on Trump’s "enemies list," but she didn't think comparing his situation to Hunter Biden's was kosher. [Symone is not related to Bernie.]

"I mean, Hunter Biden is the president’s last surviving son," Sanders said.

"I’m somebody’s son also, by the way," Cohen responded.

"Agreed. You are somebody’s son," Sanders said. "But I mean, to be very clear, you’re not the president’s son. And he pardoned Hunter primarily because that is his son, I think."

Cohen stressed how seriously Trump should be taken as a threat, especially after Cohen stabbed him in the back [figuratively] tried to screw him.

"You have to take Donald Trump for his word when he turns around," Cohen fretted. "So far, everything that he said that he intends to do, he actually intends to do. And he has been doing it one by one by one. Now, it may not all happen on day one, as he said, but ultimately he’ll have four years plus with a whole group of individuals that are now going to be filling government positions in order to help him effectuate his goals."

Cohen was sentenced to three years in prison for crimes like tax evasion, campaign finance violations, and lying to Congress while working for Trump. Since then, he's been outspoken against Trump and testified in Alvin Bragg's New York criminal case against him earlier this year as a convicted felon.

Cohen also mentioned in September that he was planning to leave the country if Trump won again.

"I'm already working on a foreign passport with a completely different name. I don't know how it's going to work as far as dealing with my wife and my children. I certainly don't want them moving to where I'm looking to go," Cohen said, possibly hoping they do not follow him and thus meet other women.

Biden faced criticism from both political sides for pardoning Hunter in December, even though he had said he wouldn't. As his term was ending, Biden also mentioned he was [LOL, it's actually his handlers, not Joe, who is one step below broccoli] considering pardons for some of Trump's political adversaries, like former RINO Liz Cheney and alleged Dr. Anthony Fauci.

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Lyin' Joe and the pardoning of Hunter's crimes

"They can't touch you now, son."

Alleged President Joe Biden said that nobody is above the law but he left out the word 'almost'. As most people know by now, Joe has pardoned his son, Hunter, 54, of every crime he has committed for an entire decade of committing crimes.

Here are the crimes Hunter has been officially charged with: 

1. Tax Evasion. He had been indicted on nine counts, including not one, not two but three felonies for tax evasion including filing a false or fraudulent tax return for tax years 2016 through 2019. Also he failed to file and pay taxes and was accused of not paying $1,400,000 in self-assessed federal taxes and using funds for his 'high' lifestyle. 

2. Illegal firearm possession. He was convicted on three felony charges regarding the purchase of a gun in 2018, and this included making a false statement on the question as to whether he used drugs. [And you may recall that Hunter disposed of the weapon in a dumpster located near a school, which is another crime.]

Alleged Crimes that did not result in formal charges:

1. Money Laundering, tax fraud, and additional financial misconduct. His laptop, which turned out not to be Russian collusion, had information on it that show possible violations like money laundering and tax fraud. 

2. Violation of the Foreign Agents Registration Act (FARA). It had been alleged that Biden needed to register as a foreign agent based on his business dealings in China, Russia, Ukraine and Romania. Being above the law and possibly knowing Daddy would pardon  him, he did not register. 

3. Drug offenses. Reports, claims and photos suggest Hunter's involvement with drug [and prostitutes] but this has not been formally charged because he is the son of the U.S. President.

4. Sex related crime. Hunter's laptop depicted him as a whoring drug-addled son-of-a-president, but no charges have been filed, and if there had been, his daddy would pardon him anyway.

Although Biden previously said he would not pardon Hunter, he now claims that his son was "singled out," [unlike the J6 protesters who were not]. 

The pardon came before Hunter was expected to be sentenced on the gun and tax evasion crimes that he was convicted of in December. 

No prison time for the friends and families of the elite.

“No reasonable person who looks at the facts of Hunter’s cases can reach any other conclusion than Hunter was singled out only because he is my son – and that is wrong,” President Biden said.

In other words, if you or I evaded paying our taxes to the tune of millions, bought a gun illegally and lied on the federal form for the purchase, then disposed of it in a dumpster near a school, and laundered money from Russia, Ukraine, China and Romania as it was earmarked for political influence, we would be forgiven by the President, even if we were not related to him or were his pal. 

If you believe that nonsense, then you might also believe that snakes have hips.

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Joe claims he won't pardon Hunter: believe him this time?

POTUS seen here picking his nose

It's hard to tell when President Joe Biden is lying because it's hard to decipher the sounds emitted from his mouth. So when the White House's incompetent black lesbian Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre [KJP] speaks on Joe's behalf, it's best to wait and see what ends up being the truth.

KJP was her usual adamant self when she claimed that Joe's drug-addled, whoring, bag-man son, Hunter, would not be granted clemency by the President. This comes one day following his rejected probation-only plea deal on gun charges and taxes that U.S. District Judge Maryellen Noreika issued after she realized Hunter's lawyers were trying to play her. 

“Is there any possibility that the president would end up pardoning his son?” a reporter asked the affirmative action Press Secretary at her regular briefing.

“No,” KJP replied, uncharacteristically responding to the question with a related answer.

When the same Fox News reporter tried to ask a follow-up question, KJP snapped, “I just said no — I just answered” and called on a different journalist, but not the guy from Africa who she always refuses to call on but someone who would ask easier questions.

The way the U.S. Constitution is worded, a president could pardon anyone they want, and in our geriatric president's case, that would be his son. However, if he did, that would cause a huge political blowback.

House Speaker Kevin McCarthy (RINO-CA) has made comments this week about a possible impeachment inquiry into the President's role in Hunter's foreign business dealings such as those in China, Mexico, Kazakhstan, Russia, and Ukraine, where Hunter did not register as a foreign agent as the law requires, and where he paid off someone referred to as the "big guy."

A reporter from the far-left Salon asked a question to which KJP claimed that Hunter did not receive "favorable treatment" from his father's Justice Department, and amazingly, nobody rolled on the floor laughing their ass off.

He borrowed Dad's aviator glasses

In fact, two IRS whistleblowers revealed that Biden-appointed US Attorneys in Washington, DC and Los Angeles blocked charges against Hunter leading to what assistant US attorney Leo Wise repeatedly admitted in court Thursday was an unprecedented plea deal.

The Salon "reporter" asked KJP, “Can you state categorically that the administration has neither sought nor received favorable treatment from the DOJ for any investigation into the president, members of the administration, his family or former President Donald Trump?”

“Absolutely not,” the incompetent Press Secretary responded. “The Department of Justice is independent, the president respects the rule of law, he’s been saying that since he was before [sic] president and that will remain the case,” she said, hoping anyone would believe the load she was shoveling.

Joe Biden repeatedly interacted with his son’s foreign business partners in spite of him lying that he never was involved with any of Hunter's business deals.

Hunter’s plea deal to two tax misdemeanors and a gun possession felony would have been expunged after two years had the judge fallen for the gambit his lawyers tried to trick the judge into signing.

The sides will appear again in court in 30 days after filings on next steps.

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