Biden's autopen went nuclear while the media pretends otherwise

The Biden autopen scandal just went nuclear, and the media is pretending it's no big deal because Orange Man Bad did something about it. But let's be real here.

Donald Trump just dropped the hammer on Friday: every single document Joe Biden allegedly "signed" with that little robot pen in his final days has been terminated. And suddenly that Axios report from September that everybody memory-holed is back from the dead, because now there are actual consequences.

Kayleigh McEnany absolutely torched it on Saturday, pointing out the obvious: yeah, every president uses an autopen sometimes. That's not the issue. The issue is when your own staff secretary is basically screaming into the void, "Wait, did the vegetable in the Oval Office actually approve this or are we just making it up now?"

Marc Thiessen, who actually having worked in a real White House under George W. Bush, laid it out perfectly: "Bush didn't want to have any doubts about things. So I remember once there was a continuing resolution to keep the government open, and he was at the APEC summit out in Asia, and they actually took an aide and flew the bill out to Asia so that he could physically sign the bill. So, you know, that's how seriously [Bush] took this."

Compare that to Biden World, where the staff secretary, Stef Feldman, is frantically emailing: "When did we get [Biden's] approval of this?"

And then two weeks later: "I'm going to need email from... original chain confirming [Biden] signs off on the specific documents when they are ready."

Translation: Nobody knew if Joe even understood what planet he was on, much less what he was "signing."

Thiessen didn’t hold back: "The staff secretary clearly had concerns about this and was aware of it and wasn't sure that Biden was actually issuing these orders… And so, you know, the pardon is a power of the president himself. And to have pardons signed by autopen when the people running the autopen weren't even sure the president had agreed to pardon somebody, that's pretty bad stuff."

"Pretty bad stuff" is putting it mildly. We're talking about a guy who was clearly non compos mentis (Thiessen's exact Latin, because even he couldn’t find an English phrase gentle enough) having his name stamped on record-setting numbers of pardons and commutations while his handlers ran around in a post-Hunter-pardon "mad dash" to find random people to let off the hook without even looping in DOJ.

And now Trump says none of those autopen "signatures" count anymore.The same people who spent four years telling us January 6th invalidated the entire 2016 election are about to discover the sacred sanctity of the autopen. 

I can't wait for the meltdown.

If you like Brain Flushings and want to Buy Me a Coffee, I would appreciate it, as it supports my work. Obviously, there is no pressure but I certainly wouldn't stop you.

Tweet

Pam Bondi to Biden's Crew: Autopen Shenanigans? We're Auditing Every Last Stroke

Look, we all knew Biden's White House was running on fumes and favors, but the latest Oversight Committee gut-punch on his [or someone's] autopen addiction and the epic cover-up of his fade-to-black is the kind of "bombshell" that makes even the most jaded conservative crack a grim smile. Enter Attorney General Pam Bondi. She is not wasting a New York minute before unleashing the hounds of the basketballs.

As Red State's Nick Arama laid out yesterday, the House Oversight crew dropped a report that's basically a neon sign screaming "IMPEACHMENT AFTER THE FACT." No "sufficient contemporaneous documentation" that doddering Joe personally green-lit executive moves? Boom, those decisions are as void as Biden's sense of direction.

The report zeroed in on the pardons, demanding the DOJ "immediately conduct a review of all executive actions" from Biden's Oval Office squat, as per Arama's report.

Cue the Republican House Committee on Oversight and Government Reform, firing off a letter to Bondi like it's happy hour at the accountability bar. Their X post nailed it: "In light of our bombshell Biden Autopen Presidency report, Chairman [Republican Rep. James Comer (KY-1)] is calling on @AGPamBondi to conduct a review of ALL executive actions taken during the Biden presidency," the post read.

"He's also referring Dr. Kevin O'Connor, Annie Tomasini, and Anthony Bernal for further investigation after they took the Fifth during our deposition," it added. Bondi is all in, quicker than Hunter sniffing out a cocaine stash. Her response was a masterclass in "hold my Diet Coke":

"My team has already initiated a review of the Biden administration's reported use of autopen for pardons," Bondi wrote. "@RepJamesComer's new information is extremely helpful, and his leadership on this issue is invaluable. We'll continue working with @GOPoversight to deliver accountability for the American people."

Arama's deep dive exposed the Biden bunker mentality in all its staged glory: From micromanaging Joe's "makeup, clothing, and schedule" to rationing his "number of steps" like he's training for the shuffleboard Olympics. They even dialed back cabinet meets, cribbed SOTU tips from Tinseltown hacks, and propped up teleprompters at whisper-quiet shindigs. 

So if they tell us they didn't know Joe's mental status, they're assuming we're too stupid to believe our eyes, ears and sense of smell.

Not one soul in the interviews admitted to worrying over Joe's mental melt-down. Zilch on chats about his "cognitive health with anyone inside or outside of the White House." It's like they all signed a pact: Deny, deflect, and deploy the autopen.

President Trump has maintained radio silence so far, but give it time; he's probably drafting the "I told you so" in gold Sharpie.

Bottom line: Biden never belonged anywhere near that Resolute Desk, and payday is coming for the grifters who handled him like a puppet while gaslighting us.

If you like Brain Flushings and want to Buy Me a Coffee, I would appreciate it, as it supports my work. Obviously, there is no pressure but I certainly wouldn't stop you. 

Tweet

Swalwell's Tantrum: Dems Must Swear to Smash Trump's Glorious White House Ballroom or Hit the Road

Eric Swalwell: the man who brought you Fang Fang and the "Fart Heard Round the World"

Oh, here we go again, folks, another day, another unhinged meltdown from the fever swamps of the Democratic Party. Fox News political analyst Lisa Boothe nailed it this weekend, breaking down the left's collective freakout over President Donald Trump's bold move to finally give the White House the upgrade it has been begging for amid the ongoing government shutdown drama. Because nothing says screwed up "priorities" like screeching about chandeliers while the border's wide open and the economy's roaring back to life under Trump 2.0.

Enter Rep. Eric Swalwell, the "Make Believe Ballroom" California Democrat who's still smarting from his 2020 primary flop and that whole Fang Fang spy scandal and his televised fart we all pretended to forget. Swalwell's out here playing kingmaker for 2028, declaring that the next Democratic presidential hopeful better treat Trump's magnificent new White House ballroom like it's the Death Star. He wants it turned to rubble on inauguration morning, or don't even bother showing up to the clown convention they call a primary.

"Don’t even think of seeking the Democratic nomination for president unless you pledge to take a wrecking ball to the Trump Ballroom on DAY ONE," Swalwell wrote on X on Saturday. 

Swalwell's office ghosted Fox News Digital when asked for a follow-up. Shocker. Probably too busy practicing their wrecking-ball swings in a San Francisco safe space.

Funny how it's okay for the left to make rubble out of the White House, but when Trump does it to rebuild a ballroom, it's outrageous.

Now, let's talk about this "Trump Ballroom" that's got the blue-check brigade clutching their pearls like it's the end of Versailles. For the first time in its 200-plus-year history, the people's house is getting a proper formal ballroom: a sprawling 90,000-square-foot masterpiece rising where the East Wing once squatted, all funded by President Trump himself and a cadre of private donors to the tune of $250 million. No taxpayer money, mind you, because unlike the grifters in the Biden-Harris clown car who blew billions on beachfront bunkers, Trump's keeping it classy and crowdfunded.

Back on July 31, White House press secretary Karoline Leavitt dropped the mic with the announcement, laying out why this isn't just bling, it's necessity wrapped in elegance. "The White House is currently unable to host major functions honoring world leaders in other countries without having to install a large and unsightly tent approximately 100 yards away from the main building's entrance," Leavitt said, adding the new ballroom will be "a much-needed and exquisite addition."

Picture it: 650 seated guests under crystal domes, classical architecture that screams American grandeur, no more embarrassing pop-up circus tents like we're hosting a state fair for sheikhs and senators. The White House has never had a formal ballroom before. Can you imagine FDR or Reagan settling for a glorified lean-to? But leave it to the woke warriors to turn a triumph into a tragedy.

And don't get me started on the haters whining about the demolition photos, because, newsflash, progress sometimes means saying goodbye to the outdated. Construction kicked off earlier this month, and it's already got the Trump magic touch.

But wait, there's more! 

Trump's not stopping at the ballroom. He's sprinkled gold accents throughout the Oval Office and Cabinet Room like the Midas of MAGA, because why not make the people's workspace look like the winner's circle it is? 

He's unveiled a towering new monument, the "Arc de Trump," a "walk of fame" lined with portraits of our greatest commanders-in-chief, including a cheeky autopen snapshot standing in for Sleepy Joe's "tenure" as a not-so-subtle reminder of who the real placeholders were. 

Joe Biden

Stone pavers now grace the Rose Garden lawn, banishing the mud-pit vibes forever, and two massive 88-foot flagpoles fly Old Glory higher than ever, a middle finger to the flag-burners and kneelers who've tried to dim our shine.

Trump's office gold? The Oval looking like it belongs to a president who actually wins wars and deals, not doodles on classified docs.

This is legacy-building, pure and simple—the kind of bold, unapologetic patriotism that makes the White House worthy of its name again. And Swalwell? He's just the latest sad sack auditioning for the role of village idiot, demanding Dems swear an oath to undo it all because... Trump bad. Folks, if that's their litmus test for 2028, the GOP's got four more years in the bag. Pass the popcorn—and maybe a hard hat for the next round of Democrat demolition derbies.

If you like Brain Flushings and want to Buy Me a Coffee, I would appreciate it, as it supports my work. Obviously, there is no pressure but I certainly wouldn't stop you.