Lebanon exploding pagers wound dozens in unmentionable body parts of Hezbollonians

Israel is not taking credit for dozens of personal Hezbollah pagers from remotely detonating in Lebanon on Tuesday, wounding dozens in places where men don't want to be wounded and also in hands above the waist. 

The phenomenon was reported by state-run media, which means it has to be true because it sure isn't a good look for Hezbollah.

[H/T Fox News Digital.]

This included hundreds of hand-held pagers as Lebanon's state-run National News Agency reported. "The handheld pagers system was detonated using advanced technology, and dozens of injuries were reported," [by men with unusually high-pitched voices].

It isn't yet known if anyone was killed by the exploding pagers, but it's possible that some of the men might wish they were dead, based on where they kept their device.

One man, [we'll call him Ahmed] was injured in his groin area. "I was looking at a beautiful pair of eyes from under the niqab and suddenly I felt a warmth coming from beneath my shirwal. I thought it was from my reaction to her beauty, but no, it was my pager heating up in my pocket and then it exploded. Please don't laugh at my voice."

Lebanon's state-run National News Agency reported that in Beirut’s southern suburbs and other areas "the handheld pagers system was detonated using advanced technology, and dozens of injuries were reported." It wasn't immediately clear if people were killed.

Although Israel isn't taking credit for the incident, they are quite adept in technology, and smart beats brawn in the long run every time.

Am Yisrael Chai! 

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Explosion goes off near nuclear site Natanz, Iran according to report

Natanz uranium enrichment facility (AP Photo/Vahid Salemi)

Natanz, Iran -- A blast in the area of a nuclear facility in Natanz was reported on Saturday. According to officials, the blast was caused by an air defense test.

The explosion was heard at least 12 miles away from the nuclear plant, the IRNA, Iran's state propaganda news outlet reported.

“Badroud residents heard the noise and saw a light which showed an object had just blown up in the skies over the city,” a witness told IRNA.

Nour News, a website linked to Iran's Revolutionary Guards, claimed the blast was not an attack but was caused by a missile testing Iran's air defenses' preparation for a potential attack, which is only likely to happen if Iran tries to destroy Israel, or the Jewish State gets good intel that Iran is ready to preemptively strike them.

Some of the reports said a drone was shot down but with all the fake news nowadays, you never know.

The blast comes amid high tensions between Iran and world powers. Meanwhile, Tehran continues to enrich Uranium and only an idiot or a demented individual such as Joseph Robinette Biden, would think that it's only for the purpose of heating homes.

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The explosion comes only one day after nuclear negotiations were halted in Vienna, with Western countries saying Iran had come to the talks with unrealistic proposals, such as allowing them to eliminate Israel and all the Jews, for example.

Iran’s uranium enrichment facilities in Natanz have seen several reported attacks in recent years which have been attributed to Israel. Hopefully they are correct because it gives one the sense of relief knowing that Israel can accomplish such a feat.

This past April, the underground facility in Natanz suffered an unexplained explosion causing damage to some of its centrifuges. In July, there were fires of unknown cause that struck the advanced centrifuge assembly plant, which was later described as sabotage.

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