Gwyneth Paltrow's candles smell like her vagina, she says

Actress Gwyneth Paltrow knows what her vagina smells like and she's thrilling her fans with the opportunity to know too. How she knows is anyone's guess--did she use a hairdryer to blow the smell upward to her nostrils? Did someone tell her that what her vagina smells like? Does her vagina smell so strongly that she can smell it while standing up? Who knows? I don't know.

But for $75 a pop, you can smell her company's Goop candles and let that smell waft to your very own nostrils and think what you like. The name of her candle is "This Smell Like My Vagina." I mean it.

Paltrow first came across a scent at a local fish market that she said reminded her of the smell of her own vagina, she claims. The scent was then finalized for the “This Smells Like My Vagina” candle, which reportedly sold out within hours of its test run by lonely old men and people who identify as a man.

“This candle started as a joke between perfumer Douglas Little and GP — the two were working on a fragrance, and she blurted out, ‘Uhhh … this smells like a vagina.'” Again, it's unclear how the lovely actress gained familiarity of that odor, but that's a private matter.

The odor then “evolved into a funny, gorgeous, sexy, and beautifully unexpected scent,” according to the company's spokes-smeller.

“That turned out to be perfect as a candle — we did a test run … and it sold out within hours,” Goop bragged. “It’s a blend of geranium, citrusy bergamot, and cedar absolutes juxtaposed with Damask rose and ambrette seed that puts us in mind of fantasy, seduction, and a sophisticated warmth,” and had become a part of Ms. Paltrow's regular morning in which she takes each item and rubs it on her vagina.

In 2018 Goop settled a six-figure lawsuit surrounding their “vagina eggs,” which were prompted to help regulate females’ hormones and negate menstrual cramps, a promise that turned out to be as empty as Joy Behar's head. 

Ironically, Behar was the first person to purchase one of the candles.

Please consider following this blog, and remember, every time you click on an ad, an angel gets its wings.

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Ben Affleck accused of groping Hilarie Burton

What's good for the goose is allegedly good for Ben Affleck. The pressure is on him now that the Harvey Weinstein scandal is out of the closet. 

Actress Hilarie Burton claimed on Twitter that she was groped by Afflect during his appearance on TRL (Total Request Live) which she was hosting in 2003. The claim came just hours after Affleck issued a carefully worded statement condemning Weinstein's alleged sexual assaults and harassment of actresses that spanned three decades, including such names as Gwyneth Paltrow and Angelina Jolie.

Affleck's statement, which came after five days of silence from him and other notable folks (like Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton, for example) he was summarily attacked by Rose McGowan, the actress instrumental in exposing Weinstein.

McGowan insinuated she had told Ben Affleck about her experience with sleazy Weinstein, and he reacted in a way that suggested he knew Weinstein's "MO" with women and how he harassed them and was sexually inappropriate. 

McGowan and Affleck co-starred in Phantoms, in 1998. The film was distributed by Weinstein's Miramax and released the following year after an alleged episode between Weinstein and McGowan at a Sundance hotel room. Weinstein paid her $100,000 which kind of makes him look like he had done something and he wanted her to keep her mouth shut about it.

One fan tweeted that Affleck might as well have "kept quiet," and another Twitter user tweeted: "He also grabbed Hilarie Burton's breasts on TRL once. Everyone forgot though."

Then Hilarie Burton jumped into the Twitter thread confirming that she remembered the incident in which she wrote: "I was a kid."

Yes, she wa a 21-year-old 'kid' at the time--too young to say something because she was afraid she'd never go far in Hollywood, I suspect.

Then she tweeted a clip of TRL outtakes and says (most likely referring to the Affleck groping): "he comes over and tweaks my left boob." With that clip, which was edited and presented as a glimpse at life behind the scenes on TRL, commenting in a way that suggests she laughed off the incident as a psychological defense.

McGowan claims she was assaulted by Weinstein in 1997 and has been calling out the Affleck brothers over their silence on the Weinstein scandal all week.


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Obama's Future Plan for Gitmo and the USA

Hussein Obama may be preparing to close the Guantanamo Bay prison facility in Cuba. According to a Wall Street Journal story, the White House is "drafting options" allowing our jihad-sympathizing president to close Gitmo by overriding congressional restrictions on bringing Islamic jihadists to the U.S.

I pray the prisoners all head over to Gwyneth Paltrow's mansion where she can volunteer to become their sex slave and "go jihad" all over her.

The White House responded to the story by claiming Barack Hussein opposes the restrictions (he likes his jihadists up close and personal here in the U.S. A.) but his first choice is to work with both parties in resolving this issue (and do things his way).

If you believe he really wants to work with both parties, check out this genuine Rolex watch here inside my coat.

"For many years now, we've always looked at options to close Guantanamo Bay," White House butt-boy, Eric Schultz told the press. You remember Schultz--he was the Nazi Sergeant who said "I don't know nuthink; I don't see nuthink."

It doesn't matter to Obama that most Americans oppose by a huge margin the closing down of the facility. Nor does it matter to our illustrious community organizer Alinsky socialist that we are in the throes of war with ISIS, even though he refuses to call it a war.

What matters to Obama is that he fundamentally change America.

And the change is going according to plan. He is reducing the influence of the U.S. in favor of a global government, where no one nation stands above another. Where none is really exceptional. Where a global economy rules the earth.

He might even call it Communism.

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