Greek Life attacked by banana peel in tree

No, this is not the Onion, although I try my hand at satire here quite often. Sometimes the truth is stranger than fiction.

An article in CampusReform.org titled "Greek Life retreat cancelled after banana peel found in tree" discusses how the retreat at the University of Mississippi (Ole Miss) was cancelled this week due to the discovery of a banana peel in a tree, kind of like the title alluded to.

"To be clear, many members of our community were hurt, frightened, and upset by what occurred at IMPACT," Interim Director of Fraternity and Sorority Life Alexa Lee Arndt said in an email between Greek leaders.

"Because of the underlying reality many students of color endure on a daily basis, the conversation manifested into a larger conversation about race relations today at the University of Mississippi," she added.

Ryan Swanson, a student at Ole Miss, admitted to throwing the banana peel onto a limb of a tree because he said he couldn't find a garbage can and his parents always taught him not to throw garbage on the ground. "Find a tree and toss your garbage onto a branch where it will not interfere with the peripatetic who might find it repugnant to see it lying on the ground," Swanson's father used to say.

The banana peel was discovered by Alpha Kappa Alpha President Makala McNeil, a leader of one of the campuses historically black ('no whites allowed') sororities.

"The overall tone was heavy. I mean, we were talking about race in Mississippi and in the Greek community so there's a lot involved," the fragile snowflake recalled. She recalled how she and her friend were "all just sort of paranoid for a second," after spotting a banana peel in a tree.

Think of the symbolism: banana + tree = fruit tree. That's racist.

After word of the banana spread throughout the retreat, leaders decided it was too dangerous to continue. Arndt said she "felt it was imperative [yes, she said 'imperative'] to provide space immediately to students affected by this incident," and perhaps some psychological counseling for anyone who would somehow be able to twist a banana peel in a tree into a racist symbol against blacks, rather than, say, monkeys or other creatures that eat bananas in trees, but only monkeys come to mind.

According to the Daily Mississippian, some students left the retreat in tears, with McNeil noting that they "didn't feel welcome" and "didn't feel safe."

Swanson apologized for throwing his banana peel onto a tree limb and wrote in a statement that he wishes to "sincerely apologize for the events that took place this past weekend."

"Although unintentional, there is no excuse for the pain that was caused to members of our community," he wrote. "I have much to learn and look forward to doing such and encourage all members of our community to do the same."

Yes, always remember, boys and girls, that no matter what you do, if people want to be offended by your actions, they will find a way to do so, and you will be sorry for being a person of "white privilege."

Swanson copped out to the accusations of 'hurt feelings' just as his fellow fragile deer in the headlights wanted him to. 

Meanwhile, at Clemson University, an email exchange between top school officials suggests the administration welcomed the chance to use the now infamous "banana banner" incident to push a progressive agenda and, hopefully, stifle free speech.

On April 11th, a bunch of bananas was found hanging from a banner on campus honoring African Americans at Clemson. Protests naturally followed and a sit-in that lead to the arrest of five students who probably didn't study for an upcoming exam.

But a FOIA request obtained by Campus Reform showed emails by Clemson officials that apparently regarded the incident as a way to drown out conservative sentiments from the administration. In fact, one email suggested the administration believed the banana hanging incident was not racially motivated.

Students looking for something to protest, didn't believe otherwise.

So while Clemson administrators knew more than they disclosed about the nature of the "banana banner," they did nothing to disabuse those who believed it a form of hate speech by banana.

Apparently truth is no longer a fact-based commodity; it all depends on how you feel.


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Wiki's Julian Assange fires back

WikiLeaks founder and head leaker Julian Assange fired back at the U.S. intelligence community for reporting his anti-secrecy website was used by Russia to distribute hacked information from Democratic staffers during the presidential campaign season.

The blond wonder spoke during a Periscope Q&A session and claimed that his source of information was not a member "of any government" or "state parties" nor did the source "come from the Russian government." He said Friday's declassified intelligence report on "Assessing Russian Activities and Intentions on Recent US Elections" was inadequate and misleading.

"It was not an intelligence report," Assange said. "It does not have the structure of an intelligence report. It does not have the structure of a Presidential Daily Brief. It was frankly quite embarrassing."

How does Assange know how a Presidential Daily Brief is structured? Or an intelligence report, for that matter. 

That's the scary part.

He then added: "It was clearly designed for political effect."

As much as Assange is a detestable piece of rat excrement on the shoe of Abu Bakr al Baghdadi's sandal, I kind of believe him. The reason for this is because it has become so obvious how often the Obama administration has lied to us, it becomes almost impossible to believe anything they say, including "hello."

When Assange was asked if it's possible that WikiLeaks' source was a go-between affiliated with the Russian government, he answered saying he didn't want to "play twenty questions with our sources."

An answer filled with more questions.

The intelligence report was prepared at the direction of Lame Duck President Obama, with whom even going to a mens room can be a political act. He laid the blame for the breach of the Democratic officials' emails at the feet of Putin and the Russians, without mentioning the breathtaking stupidity of John Podesta and Hillary Clinton for the ways in which they failed to protect their emails. 

Podesta's password was 'password.' Clinton's server was in a toilet in Colorado. Do you know anything about what Colorado toilets are like? 

Seriously, how can you trust the judgment of either one of those clowns?

But the real irony is that our government knew about Russia's hacking for several years, but only now, with the election defeat of Hillary Clinton, the Obamatron, is our so-called president going after Russia with silly sanctions that make Vladimir's nipples hard.

The intelligence report stated: "We assess with high confidence that Russian military intelligence . . . relayed material to WikiLeaks."

That may or may not be true, but if the report said otherwise, I would bet that people in the intelligence community would be asking: "Do you want to supersize those fries?"

When asked if he believed the report was "fabricated" Assange said "Most of this so-called intelligence report is not even fabricated. That is, it does not even make assertions for the most part to rise to the level of fabrications . . . it uses speculative terms and admits its own speculation."

When it got down to the nitty-gritty, Assange said that he didn't think it mattered who gave WikiLeaks the information. "Even if you believe that hackers of some kind illicitly obtained the Podesta emails and the DNC emails we published . . . what are we talking about in terms of impact?" He then said, "What was discussed are the words of Hillary Clinton, John Podesta and her team revealing unethical practices, corruption, hypocrisy, etcetera."

Then Assange asked: "Should the American people have been denied that true information?"

And the truth shall set you free--unless you're a Democrat.



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