BREAKING: Minneapolis Catholic school shooting, prompted huge law enforcement response

Alright, folks, strap in for another grim chapter in the saga of a world gone mad. A shooting rocked Annunciation Catholic School in Minneapolis on Wednesday, and the details are as gut-wrenching as you’d expect. Minnesota’s own Governor Tim Walz, never one to miss a chance to emote on X, chimed in with, "I've been briefed on a shooting at Annunciation Catholic School" and "I'm praying for our kids and teachers whose first week of school was marred by this horrific act of violence." Thanks for the prayers, Tim, but let's get to the meat of this.

The Minneapolis Police Department, via a city message, tried to calm the panic with, "there is no active threat to the community at this time" and "the shooter is contained.”  Fox 9 sources say the suspect, whose name is still under wraps, isn't just contained but dead. One less problem to deal with, I suppose. City officials added, "Stay away from the area to allow emergency personnel to help victims." Solid advice, because nothing screams chaos like rubberneckers clogging up a crime scene.

The visuals are straight out of a nightmare. Footage from the scene showed parents hustling their kids away from the school, probably wondering how "back to school" turned into "run for your life." Locals told Fox 9 they heard so much gunfire they thought someone was hammering shingles on a roof. That's right, gunshots so frequent they blend into the neighborhood soundtrack. A federal source, not one for sugarcoating, told the outlet that a "substantial number" of people were injured. No word on specifics, but that phrase doesn't exactly scream "minor incident."

Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem jumped in, saying, "DHS is monitoring the horrific shooting at Annunciation Catholic School in Minneapolis." She added, "We are in communication with our interagency partners, and will share more information as soon as it becomes available. I am praying for the victims of this heinous attack and their families." 

Minneapolis Mayor Jacob Frey, not to be outdone in the "I’m on top of this" department, declared, "I’m monitoring reports of horrific violence in South Minneapolis." He's in touch with Chief O'Hara, and the city's emergency response team is apparently activated. "We will share more information as soon as we can. Please give our officers the space they need to respond to the situation," he said. 

The ATF's St. Paul office confirmed their agents are on the scene, responding to "an active shooter situation at Annunciation Church in Minneapolis." And President Trump, never one to sit out a crisis, posted on Truth Social: "I have been fully briefed on the tragic shooting in Minneapolis, Minnesota. The FBI quickly responded and they are on the scene. The White House will continue to monitor this terrible situation. Please join me in praying for everyone involved!" 

Monitoring, praying, briefing: sounds like D.C. has a thesaurus open to the crisis management page.

The school, part of Annunciation Church and serving K-8 kids, just kicked off the academic year on Monday, per Fox 9. Nothing says "welcome back" like dodging bullets, right? This is where we're at, schools turning into war zones while politicians and bureaucrats churn out the same tired script. 

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