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If there's one thing the left's street theater has taught us, it's that nothing says "mostly peaceful" quite like a gaggle of grown adults playing dress-up to dodge the long arm of the law. You know the drill: bandanas yanked up like wannabe outlaws, ski masks straight out of a bad '80s heist flick, or those novelty character masks that leave just enough eyeball real estate to glare at the cameras.
Lately in Portland, where the nightly "protests" have morphed into a full-blown cosplay convention outside the ICE facility, these merry pranksters have upped the ante. Full-blown costumes now, folks, the kind that wouldn't look out of place at a Comic-Con for malcontents. It's a page ripped right from the "No Kings" playbook back in mid-October, where the goal is straight-up deception of the feds trying to do their jobs.
A couple of snapshots from the scene say they've got more layers than an onion.
But here's where the plot twists: Those new rules slated to kick in come January just got fast-tracked. DHS hit the fast-forward button, and they're live now. No more hiding behind the Halloween haul if you're breaking the law. Straight from the DHS site, do yourself a favor and hit the "prohibited conduct" section for the unvarnished truth:
All persons are prohibited from engaging in the following conduct, on federal property or in areas outside federal property, that affects, threatens, or endangers federal property or persons on the federal property:
(a) Disorderly conduct, which includes, but is not limited to, assaulting, fighting, harassing, intimidating, threatening or other violent behavior, lewd acts, or the inappropriate disposal of feces, urine, and other bodily fluids.
(b) Wearing a mask, hood, disguise, or device that conceals the identity of the wearer when attempting to avoid detection or identification while violating any federal, state, or local law, ordinance, or regulation.
(c) Creating a loud or unusual noise, noxious odor, or other nuisance. Katie Daviscourt, the Post Millennial's investigative reporter who held her own at President Trump's Antifa roundtable last month, nails it: the new policy is a "game changer" in this endless tug-of-war between the black-bloc berserkers, their media cheerleaders, and an administration that's finally pushing back.
DHS laid it out in their rollout: The rushed timeline? Blame the "sharp uptick in violence" against immigration officers and detention centers—because nothing screams "justice reform" like firebombing feds. Other goodies in the package?
Expanded Charging Authority: FPS gets the green light to nail violators on or off property, as long as it messes with Uncle Sam's turf or tenants.
Modernized Prohibited Conduct: Drones, unauthorized tinkering, and digital sabotage are all off-limits now, because apparently even the tech bros in the mob need boundaries.
Additional Prohibited Conduct: Extra ammo for anything gumming up the works on federal grounds, safety, security, the whole orderly shebang.
Clearer Public Notice: Signs at the gates spelling it out, no fine print required.
Collaboration with Stakeholders: Teamwork makes the dream work: feds, guards, and local cops all in the huddle. Look, if history's any guide, the ACLU's ambulance-chasers will be filing briefs before the ink dries. Free speech! Expression!
Oh, the humanity! But until the Ninth Circuit plays dress-up judge, at least ICE's got a sharper toolkit to unmask the mobs, and remind Portland's enablers that those "nonexistent" anarchists? Yes, they're very real, and very done hiding.
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