Putin and Xi agree: Kamala Harris is a space cadet mentally

Russian President Vladimir Putin and China's dictator Xi Jinping are laughing at Kamala Harris almost as hard as she laughs at her own brain farts.

Vice President Kamala Hahaharris was at Vandenberg Air Force Base in California on Monday where she moved her mouth and words spilled out and then she laughed for some reason only she knew. Her speech made her sound like an unprepared junior high school kid who didn't do the reading assignment and was told to speak to the class about the book.

"Space is exciting!" Harris, she began as the crowd of cadets listened and waited for her wisdom that never came. "It affects us all and it connects us all," she said, as the cadets hoped to hear wisdom and words of deep understanding of the human condition and maybe even stuff about space they didn't know.

Harris next announced that the U.S. would halt "destructive satellite tests," where your missile blows up your own, old satellite in orbit. 

"These tests are dangerous and we will not conduct them," Harris promised. Then she called on all nations including China and Russia to join the blowing up satellite ban.

Unbeknownst to Harris, the United States has no plans to blow up satellites, either in orbit or on its way up. That was so, you know, so 1985--the one and only time we performed such a cool feat. The test involving an Air Force F-15 fighter and a special missile. In 2008, we did shoot down a broken spy satellite in such a way that the pieces returning to Earth would burn up before doing any damage.

After that, there were no further anti-satellite missions, so Hahaharris was making a unilateral promise to stop doing something that wasn't being done. And yes, she is the Vice President of the United States of America. Rumor has it that when he heard what Harris said, Putin laughed so hard that borscht shot out of his nose.

Russia blew up a satellite on orbit in Nov. 15, 2021, so it's doubtful that Putin cares a fig about what Harris has to say.

Xi is also laughing at her. 

China doesn’t do arms control and has plans to dominate space. China responded on Tuesday by inviting all UN members to its space station and flooding party mouthpiece People’s Daily with pictures of the three Chinese Communist astronauts who just returned to Earth on Apr. 13.

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Using Harris in diplomatic fashion for issues involving outer space is like sending her to the southern border or sending James Taylor with his guitar to sing about climate change and algebra. [Did you hear about the dyslexic guy who walked into a bra?]

Yes, this administration, like my comment in brackets above, is like a bad joke. But that isn't stopping important people from laughing at us, which is not funny.

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NoKo seeks space program, vows to launch more satellites

"Boom, Zoom, right to the moon"

They're not just building democracy-destroying ballistic missiles, now North Korea's corpulent dictator Kim Jong Un wants his hermit nation to get their own space program. He is vowing to launch more satellites and says that efforts to stop their space program is "not tolerable."

It's a five-year program NoKo's main propaganda newspaper, Rodong Sinmun, announced Monday. The regime's claim is that the goals are to improve the economy and "livelihood" of North Korean residents, according to Yonhap News Agency. 

"Some countries have manipulated the U.N. sanctions resolutions against us and hindered the sovereign country's space development," the newspaper said. "It is not a tolerable act. It is a global trend that a country seeks the economic growth with the space program."

Perhaps they're planning to farm cheese on the moon to go with the grass their people are calling a vegetable on the Earth.

North Korea has made advances in the space program since fat Kim Jong Un came into power in 2011 after his father died. They launched their first satellite at the end of 2012 after giving it the old high school try since 1998.


The satellite achieved stable orbit but just kept making circles around the Earth--it couldn't transmit data because the telephone cord was too short.

Monday's announcement might signal a possible long-range rocket launch, according to Yonhap News Agency. Two new buildings near Sohae launching station were seen via satellite imagery. Some experts believe North Korea wants to launch more satellites to test its ballistic missile technology.

Kim has been described not only as a Dennis Rodman fan, but also a "micro-manager" who likes to have people around him taking notes, even if they're only doodling.

Military generals are often heard saying, "Kim is coming; quick, look busy."



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