Axis of Evil Reunion Tour Kicks Off in Tehran as Mullahs High-Five Putin and Xi!

In what can only be described as the world’s most awkward diplomatic threesome, Iranian Deputy Foreign Minister Kazem Gharibabadi proudly announced he huddled up Saturday with the ambassadors from Russia and China right there in Tehran, where they hammered out their latest “strategic partnership” memo.

“Discussions and exchanges of views were held regarding the latest developments on that draft memorandum from Islamabad,” Gharibabadi declared, sounding like a guy who just closed on a timeshare in Mordor. He then doubled down: “The strategic partnership between Iran, China, and Russia, plus all our cozy little coordinations, will continue with full strength!”

Al, Lou, Snackbar

Translation for the folks at home: While the mullahs are supposedly inches away from signing some grand “peace deal” with the United States to end their favorite hobby of regional chaos, they’re simultaneously locking arms with Communist China and Putin’s Russia like it’s a supervillain family reunion. 

This heartwarming announcement dropped right after Pakistan’s Prime Minister Shehbaz Sharif breathlessly told the world a U.S.-Iran peace agreement could be wrapped up in the next 24 hours. 

Sure, nothing boosts confidence in a deal like the Iranian regime bragging about its unbreakable bromance with America’s top two strategic rivals.

Sleep tight, folks. The adults who think “strategic patience” with terrorists is a winning strategy are definitely in charge. What could possibly go wrong?

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