Javier Milei shreds ‘useless’ UN to its face in fiery speech to 'fatally arrogant parasites'

NEW YORK — World leaders gathered at the United Nations General Assembly were left in utter shock Wednesday after Argentine President Javier Milei used his scheduled speaking time to state simple facts instead of reading a bland, pre-approved statement off an index card about global cooperation.

The chainsaw-wielding, free-market libertarian took the podium in New York to address the body, where he boldly dropped a truth bomb and referred to as "useless" and populated by "fatally arrogant parasites."

"That’s to say, it has become a useless organization whose only purpose is to sustain a caste of fatally arrogant parasites masquerading as well-intentioned bureaucrats," Milei charged, causing several career diplomats to drop their organic iced lattes in horror.

Milei commended the U.N.’s founding mission of resolving conflict peacefully as "noble words," but noted that "today, regrettably, it is time to acknowledge that, in practice, that sacred covenant has been broken."

To support his claim, Milei cited the U.N.’s enthusiasm for global pandemic lockdowns, radical climate policies, and aggressive social engineering.

"During the pandemic, bodies under the auspices of this house put themselves before scientific evidence and the sovereignty of nations and promoted forced lockdown policies throughout the world," Milei stated. "Where some allege a public health policy error, we see a global experiment in social control disguised as science. And when a state wearing public health blinkers deprives its population of the right to work, to receive an education and to bid farewell to their dead, this results in millions of avoidable deaths; there is a word for it, genocide."

"Every time [the U.N.] failed, rather than reviewing the model or apologizing, they doubled down," he added, accurately summarizing the operating procedure of every government agency since the dawn of time.

Milei continued his ruthless audit of the international body, pointing out the awkward contradiction of an entity claiming to protect human rights while elevating human rights violators.

"Those who were supposed to guarantee collective security and human rights failed in their task. They allowed chaos, violence and international terrorism to flourish," he said. "The alleged defenders of human rights have sheltered bloodthirsty dictatorships and regimes that stone women in the streets; they have systematically voted against Israel while remaining silent in the face of Islamic terrorism and the genocide of Christians in Africa."

The Argentine leader also noted that the U.N. looked the other way regarding the Malvinas [Falkland] Islands, calling the territory "a test of the gulf that exists between the words of international institutions and the reality upon which they purport to act."

"There's no shortage of words or resolutions; what is lacking is consequences," he asserted. "Because an institution that cannot ensure that its words carry weight in the real world loses the most important thing of all, its authority."

According to Milei, the U.N. has "built a bureaucratic leviathan devoted to deciding how the peoples of the world and their citizens should live," creating "a curious mixture of anarchy and tyranny, impotence in the face of those who break the most basic rules, such as bloodthirsty dictatorships and terrorist organizations coupled with Orwellian control and impositions on liberal democracies that abide by the rules."

Closing out his remarks, Milei offered a brief economic lesson to the assembly of professional spenders.

"I would remind them of what Mises said, ‘Good people do not think about controlling the lives of their fellow human beings.’"

At press time, U.N. officials were reportedly forming a special committee to investigate whether allowing world leaders to speak the truth violates international law.

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