Biden team will work to keep him from falling on his face, literally

President Biden’s 2024 campaign team is working feverishly to find ways to keep the 80-year-old houseplant from falling on his face. 

Their first idea was to tell the public that Joe is struggling with a diagnosis of “significant spinal arthritis.” This way when he falls, he has a medical excuse and it’s nothing for the public to worry about. 

The White House physician came up with the diagnosis earlier this year and the team hopes that it will work like a charm to assuage the fear that Biden has one foot on a banana peel and the other in the grave.

The anti-gravity team, as some call them, is making Biden wear fashionable tennis shoes and limit him from stair climbing and ambulating free-style. 

The so called president is also undergoing physical therapy with Drew Contreras, who also worked with President Obama and got Barack to the point where he could curl a 5 lb. weight without dropping it. In Joe’s case, the purpose of the therapy is to improve his chances of not falling when going from point A to point B.

Biden began wearing the tennis shoes after taking a bad fall at the Air Force Academy in June. And he also was directed by his handler[s] to board Air Force One using shorter stairs to prevent another embarrassing fall as we have all seen him take when he fell three times up the stairs before making the change.

The team doesn’t care that he falls in general, but with election season fast approaching, they want to avoid having to allow him to look his age and show his physical deterioration along with his obvious mental situation. Nobody is going to vote for a vegetable—wait—the left would if the vegetable was running against former President Trump. 

Remember how so many Democrats voted for Hillary Clinton in 2016 even after it was obvious she had physical issues?

And let’s face it, they keep re-electing Dianne Feinstein and John Fetterman. 

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