Sam Bankman-Fried jailed for leaking ex-girlfriend's love letters

Clockwise: SBF, Ellison, Rock n' Roll Mommy and Daddy

What better name than Bankman for a crypto scammer and Fried for him getting caught and possibly fried with jail time. The indicted FTX founder Sam Bankman-Fried was cuffed and hauled off to the slammer Friday following a federal judge revoking is bail for leaking his former girlfriend's love letters.

US District Judge Lewis Kaplan agreed with federal prosecutors who argued that SBF, as he is known to his fans, has jeopardized his scheduled trial by leaking the personal writings of his former lover and business associate Caroline Ellison to a reporter at the former newspaper known as The New York Times.

The judge determined that there was probable cause to believe that SBF, a human weasel, attempted to “tamper with witnesses at least twice” since his December arrest for fraud.

Bankman-Fried’s shyster lawyer Mark Cohen said his pricey team would appeal the incarceration order. Kaplan rejected the defense’s request for an immediate stay pending the outcome of the appeal.

The defense team accused prosecutors of pushing for Bankman-Fried’s jailing based on “innuendo, speculation, and scant facts.”

SBF, 31, has been under house arrest at his mommy and daddy's house in Palo Alto, California. He is under a $250,000,000 bond but now he's in jail until October 2nd when the trial is to begin. He will be held in the New York area but it's unknown as to which facility he must park his sorry butt.

The fraudster has pleaded not guilty having allegedly misused billions in FTX customer money to pay for his lavish lifestyle and super-hot former girlfriend and Olive Oyl Look-alike Contest winner Caroline Ellison along with his risky bets at Alameda Research, a sister company to FTX, shortly before his cryptocurrency empire came tumbling down.

The former FTX CEO SBF's bail was revoked during the hearing at Manhattan Federal Court on August 11th.

The feds previously said that the disgraced wonderboy had “crossed a line” by harassing Miss Ellison, the former CEO of Bankman-Fried’s doomed cryptocurrency hedge fund Alameda Research.

Ellison has already pleaded guilty to breaking hearts and fraud and is expected to be a key witness as SBF faces trial for allegedly FTX bilking customers out of billions.

Cohen had said his team had been blindsided by the prosecutors’ motion and argued that Bankman-Fried’s bail terms permitted him to speak with the media, even about private things that should stay private.

Cohen reminded the court that Bankman-Fried’s bail terms allowed him to speak with reporters, and to stop that would be infringing on his right to speak to the press, even when the things he would speak about would put him in a scummy light.

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More on FTX and Sam Bankman-Fried--yes, there's more

We haven't heard much lately on the now defunct crypto exchange FTX demise and its former head, Sam "Chubby Big" Bankman-Fried.

Well it looks like FTX now owes Jimmy Buffett's Margaritaville resort a hair under $600,000, or more than ten times what was previously believed. And just prior to declaring its bankruptcy, they racked up a DoorDash tab of around $400,000, according to court papers.

In November, FTX’s investment affiliate Alameda Research was reportedly sought after by Margaritaville resort in the Bahamas over a $55,319 bar tab, but that wasn't accurate. The court papers showed on Wednesday that the resort is claiming FTX owes them $599,409 according to Insider. 

Bloomberg reported that FTX employees reportedly stayed “for weeks or months” in about 20 suites at One Particular Harbour — a luxury tower connected to the main Margaritaville resort, named after a line in the song "Margaritaville" by Buffett, whose fans are known as "Parrotheads."

Resort staffers said workers from the since-imploded firm would pile into a shuttle bus in the morning and return to Margaritaville after their dizzy workday at the company’s Bahamas-based headquarters, according to reports.

FTX’s officers were located on the other side of the island and the trip reportedly took roughly 30 minutes.

Meanwhile, court filings this week also show that investment arm Alameda Research racked up a $403,765 Doordash bill in the months leading up to the crypto giant’s spectacular implosion. No wonder Sam, et al were so chubby a soft.

Former employees previously told the Financial Times that FTX US was given $200 per day toward DoorDash food delivery, along with free groceries, barbershop pop-up and bi-weekly massages. Two hundred dollars a day? 

These were only 75 employees. What the hell were they eating? And did the bi-weekly massages have 'happy endings,' because the company sure didn't.

Alameda Research still has an outstanding Doordash balance of $46,239, court papers show.

Lawyers handling the Chapter 11 case say Bankman-Fried had a $65 billion line of credit as his “personal piggy bank,” which he used to fund spending on real estate and Democrat donations, meaning FTX could not cover all its customer withdrawals.

Bankman-Fried and his associates also utilized company funds to purchase $300 million in luxury real estate in the Bahamas and several high-end properties in the exclusive Albany community, FTX attorneys revealed. 

Bankman-Fried is now under house arrest at his mommy and daddy's home in Palo Alto, California. He is out on a $250,000,000 bond as he awaits trial on fraud and conspiracy charges while the so-called QAnon Shaman, Jacob Chansley is serving 4 years in prison for being escorted and shown around the Capitol Building by US Capitol Police.

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Will SBF's GF [aka Olive Oyl] rat him out re: FTX collapse?

Alameda Research CEO and Popeye's girlfriend lookalike, Caroline Ellison, has the loyalty of the scorpion to the proverbial frog midstream. She was not present when Sam Bankman-Fried (aka: "Sammy The Bull Thrower") was indicted and she was seen in Manhattan's shopping district. This leads one to believe that her former boyfriend cut a deal with the DOJ. If so, Sammy's fat butt is fried.

If Ellison is not in custody, after her role in the Alameda Research part of the meltdown, it was very probable that she has agreed to a plea deal, and now we know it's true.

Worse, the other partner in the now defunct triad of trash, Gary Wang, a founder of the crypto exchange FTX, is also part of a plea deal that will undoubtedly burn Sammy and maybe even his mommy and daddy, the New York Times reported late last night:

Two former top executives of Sam Bankman-Fried’s crypto trading empire have pleaded guilty to federal charges and are cooperating in the criminal case against the disgraced crypto entrepreneur, the U.S. attorney for the Southern District of New York said on Wednesday night.

The two are Caroline Ellison, who was the chief executive of Mr. Bankman-Fried’s crypto trading company, Alameda Research, and Gary Wang, a founder of the crypto exchange FTX.

The guilty pleas by two-thirds of the trio could force other former executives to spill their guts in the case against SBF. He has been charged with fraud, money laundering and campaign finance offenses, [which benefitted the Democrats in the midterm elections and other woke causes].

Wang's lawyer told the press that his client had "accepted responsibility for his actions" implying that the young scumcrumpet's plea. deal, and probably Ellison's, involve some jail time and hopefully restitution.

And while Sammy owned 90% of Alameda Research, Ellison ran it and the money disappeared into that company, suggesting she played a large role in the clusterfrack that destroyed billions in FTX depositor funds. She also probably knows where the money went [i.e., which drain it circled down into]. If she can't pay back depositors, then her testimony, for her sake, better force butter butt Bankman to do so.

The Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) filed civil fraud charges against Ellison and Wang on Wednesday. The SEC said that Ellison, 28, misused FTX customer deposits to fund Alameda's trading activity [in other words she gambled with FTX investor's money] and that Wang, 29, created software that allowed the diversion of the funds to take place.

Based on what is known, both Ellison and Wang are going to do time, while "Sammy The Bull Thrower" may do as much as 115 years if convicted on all counts. That will make him 145 years old if he goes into the can today.

Notice how the Republicans are not attacking the Democrats over the campaign donations. That's because they're also involved in accepting Sammy's money. Sure, not as much by a long shot, but some.

Let's hope that what Bankman-Fried knows, gets to be told and that he doesn't get "Epsteined."

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BREAKING: Sammy the Bull-thrower Bankman-Fried agrees to be extradited to US

Disgraced FTX founder and overall scumcrumpet Sam Bankman-Fried has done his extradition homework and is all set to be sent from the Bahamas to the US where his ass is grass over criminal charges that allege he defrauded $1,800,000,000 from investors. For reference purposes, there are only 3,544,000 seconds in a year, so we're talking mucho dinero that he screwed people out of with the help of various celebrities. [H/T NY Post]

SBF, as he is often called by his girlfriend Olive Oyl, consented to extradition because he alleges that he wants "to make the relevant customers whole," according to court papers. Of course, this is bull pucks--he initially fought extradition but now realizes that it's no use, so this is his last ploy to somehow get away with his scam by trying to con the judicial system.

The big-bosom bag of bull arrived in Magistrate Court in Nassau, Bahamas on Wednesday at around 11:00 a.m. and told the judge that he is waiving his rights to a long and lengthy extradition hearing. He is casting his fate to the wind, and that wind will not be pleasant.

Once he arrives back in the US, he will be remanded into custody but his departure from the Bahamas is still unknown.

SBF was a key player in the lightning fast collapse of FTX, a crypto currency exchange. He allegedly used investors' money to fund his Alameda Research hedge fund and also to purchase real estate for himself and his parents.

Bankman-Fried is being prosecuted by the Southern District of New York and faces a maximum of 115 years in prison if convicted, which seems to be likely because he is, after all, guilty as a drag queen in Boys' Town.

If Bankman-Fried doesn’t get bail in New York, he is likely to be locked up Brooklyn’s notorious Metropolitan Detention Center as he awaits trial. Hopefully, he will come prepared with body wash rather than bar soap, which can cause problems if he drops it.

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Sam Bankman-Fried arrested in Bahamas, charged with money laundering, fraud

Disgraced FTX scam artist Sam Bankman-Fried [not to be confused with women's baggage thief and now fired Biden appointee, Sam Brinton] had appeared in a Bahama court on Tuesday when he made it clear that he will fight extradition to the United States as he faces a load of federal charges that include fraud, money laundering and making illegal campaign contributions. 

Bankman-Fried, 30, was the second highest Democrat donor.

While in a heavily guarded court in Nassau, Bahamas, the alleged crypto-scammer seemed relaxed and as creepy-nerdy as usual where he made it clear that he would not be waiving his right to an extradition hearing back in the US but it looks like the Democrats are worried about what he might say, so on Monday,  Bankman-Fried was arrested in the Bahamas.

Bankman-Fried is accused of defrauding customers and investors to fund a lavish lifestyle, officials said. Federal prosecutors said that beginning in 2019, he diverted investors' money to cover expenses, debts and risky trades at his crypto hedge fund, Alameda Research, in addition to making lavish purchases and illegal campaign contributions without telling his customers, according to a 13-page indictment. He also gave his Arnold Stang lookalike girlfriend a large sum of money, which should mean that she too must testify on a criminal charge.

Not the grand daughter of Arnold Stang

"All of this dirty money was used in service of Bankman-Fried's desire to buy bipartisan influence and impact the direction of public policy in Washington," Damian Williams, the U.S. attorney for the Southern District of New York, said during a news conference. [H/T Fox News]

He is charged with eight criminal offenses, ranging from wire fraud to money laundering to conspiracy to commit fraud. Williams called the case "one of the biggest frauds in American history."

Bankman-Fried was arrested by Bahamian authorities at the request of the U.S. government, a day before he was slated to testify before the House Financial Services Committee along with FTX's current CEO, John Ray III, not to be confused with the late singer by the same name.

Arnold Stang

FTX filed for bankruptcy on Nov. 11 when the firm ran out of money after the cryptocurrency equivalent of a bank run. Customers tried to withdraw their assets all at once because of growing doubts about the financial strength of the company and Alameda Research. But alas, they were too late.

The criminal indictment against Bankman-Fried and "others" at FTX is on top of civil charges announced Tuesday by the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) and the Commodity Futures Trading Commission. The SEC alleges Bankman-Fried defrauded investors and illegally used their money to buy real estate on behalf of himself and his family. He allegedly bought his mommy a multi-million dollar mansion in the Bahamas.

He executed "deliberate" transactions designed to cover up his fraud, authorities said.

Bankman-Fried was previously one of the world’s wealthiest people on paper; at one point his net worth reached $26.5 billion, according to Forbes. He was a prominent personality in Washington, donating millions of dollars toward mostly left-leaning political causes and Democratic political campaigns, though he also gave some money to Republicans.

FTX grew to become the second-largest cryptocurrency exchange in the world. The SEC complaint alleges that Bankman-Fried raised more than $1.8 billion from investors since May 2019 by promoting FTX as a safe, responsible platform for trading crypto assets. It was as safe as doing the Pencil Dance in a landmine field.

"Bankman-Fried's entire house of cards started to crumble as crypto asset prices plummeted in May 2022 and as Alameda's lenders demanded repayments on billions of dollars in loans," said Gurbir Grewal, director of the SEC's Division of Enforcement.

At Tuesday's congressional hearing, Ray, the new FTX CEO, bluntly disputed that at the hearing: "We will never get all these assets back."

Some folks are calling for Bankman-Fried to share a cell with Darrell Brooks, the Waukesha serial killer and self-declared sovereign citizen serving 6 life sentences plus more time for other crimes, if Bankman-Fried is found guilty, which is highly possible. 

If so, he faces 115 years in the slammer while Brooks faces about ten times that amount.

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FTX scammer says he isn't to blame for the collapse: "Didn't ever try to commit fraud"

Photo: NY Post

Founder and CEO of now-bankrupt crypto exchange FTX, Sam Bankman-Fried, appeared in public for the first time since his company's collapse and did all he could to try distancing himself from his involvement that left creditors having to deal with billions of dollars in losses. [H/T NY Post]

Bankman-Fried spoke with Andrew Ross Sorkin at the NY Times' Dealbook Summit at what he claimed was against the advice of his lawyers. Sounding a bit like James Clapper, he claimed that he did not knowingly [aka wittingly] commingle customer funds on FTX with funds at his proprietary trading firm, Alameda Research.

The proverbial excrement hit the fan after Bankman-Fried secretly moved $10 billion of FTX customer funds to Alameda Research, Reuters reported. No less than $1 billion in customer funds had vanished, according to people involved with the transaction who spoke with Reuters.

Bankman-Fried told Reuters the company did not “secretly transfer” but rather misread its “confusing internal labeling.

And if you believe that he knew nothing, I have an investment that will make you millions.

FTX filed for bankruptcy and Bankman-Fried stepped down as chief executive on Nov. 11, after traders pulled $6 billion from the platform in three days and rival exchange Binance abandoned a rescue deal.

“By late on Nov. 6 we were putting together all of the data…that obviously should have been part of the dashboards I was always looking at…and when we looked at that, there was a serious problem there,” Bankman-Fried claimed.

Bankman-Fried added that he “didn’t ever try to commit fraud” and that he doesn’t think he has any criminal liability because laws are for suckers.

“The real answer is that’s not what I’m focusing on. There’s going to be a time and place for me to sort of think about myself and my own future,” he said.

He might have more time to do that thinking than he thinks he has.

The 30-year-old entrepreneur launched FTX in 2019 and became an influential Democrat donor and pledged to donate most of his earnings to charities. It turns out that his favorite charities were the Democratic Party and the Sam Bankman-Fried Fund for Wayward Scammers.

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