Another Russian oligarch went flying from his hotel room window

Defenestration sucks, especially if you're the one being defenestrated. Yet another Russian businesman Pavel Antov, was at a luxury hotel in India in celebration of his 66th birthday. Somehow, Antov fell from the bedroom window and died, like at least four other Russian oligarchs who spoke out against Russian President Vladimir Putin. 

Antov was found extremely dead at the scene and local police [who have a global reputation of easily being bribed with as little a bribe as a banana] said that they didn't see anything suspicious.

So when it isn't about flying without a pilot's license, it's about not saying anything to upset Putin like Antov's buddy and travel companion Vladimir Budanov did. He mysteriously died of a stroke in his hotel room.

Now you might want to know just who Pavel Antov was before he wasn't. 

Antov was a member of Putin's United Russia party and since 2018 was a deputy of a regional parliament a little over 90 miles east of Moscow.

Antov founded a food manufacturing company Soylent Green Vladimirski Standart before he unfortunately got involved in politics. He was one of the wealthiest deputies and politicians in 2019 as listed in Russia's version of Forbes Magazine "Rubles Galore."

Antov and his comrades arrived in Odisha state in mid-December and since it wasn't March, decided not to worry about the ides of December. [Let's face it, Antov was no Caesar. and refused to beware.] He and his comrades visited various sites such as starving cows and crowds of people looking to make a rupi or two, before heading to their hotel in Rayagada, India last week. 

He was booked at the Hotel Sai International where he should have reserved a first floor suite but decided to get a better view of the town when he somehow fell to his death. Some claim his death was a suicide due to the death of his friend Budanov, just days prior to his fall, but unless he and Budenov were more than just friends, I would believe the chances that Antov offed himself are as likely as Meghan Markel being altruistic.

The one statement that may have caused Antov to partake in an early departing flight from his hotel room window was what he said in June. He spoke about a missile strike on a residential street in the Shevchenkivski district of Kyiv: "It's extremely difficult to call all this anything but terror." Of course he said it in Russia and Putin, who understood it, was obviously not a happy dick tater.

To cover his butt, Antov retracted the comment he made in a WhatsApp message. Evidently, the end-to-end encryption was on the fritz and Putin heard what was said. Antov claimed, like CNN's Joy Reid, that someone else may have sent it because when all is said and done, he was "a supporter of the president and [my] country's patriot."

Regional Police Chief Rajesh Pandit told the AFP that "[A]ll possible angles regarding the deaths of the two Russians are being checked," and hotel staff along with CCTV footage is being checked along with detailed autopsies. But alas, nothing could be found to arouse suspicion of untoward pushing of Antov or pilling of Budanov.

Defenestration is a popular, cost-effective way of pushing the point that Putin's views are the safest bet. In September, Ravil Maganov, 67, also mysteriously fell from a hospital window in Moscow. Maganov was chief of a Russian oil giant.

So this was the year in which at least four executives linked to state-owned energy leviathan Gasprom [not the place you want to bring a date at the end of the school year] were found to have "committed suicide."

It was the three shots to the head of one of them that created a buzz around the Kremlin--just kidding. If that really happened, there would be no buzz.

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