Adam Levine maxes out his vocabulary over Super Bowl Halftime Show

It isn't easy being taken seriously when your entire upper body is covered in illegible tattoos and you sing like a girly man. But Adam Levine, 39, was never told by his mom that he looks like the Dead Sea Scrolls and he spoke out against those who would hate on him for performing at the Super Bowl.

His "marvelously talented" group, Maroon 5, played music and danced poorly at the Super Bowl Halftime Show while most who watched were drunk and stuffed with chips and pretzels and had no idea of what they were seeing and why it was so noisy.

To Maroon 5's credit, nobody had a costume malfunction--all zippers and buttons remained intact--and the night was magical with singing and showing off Levine's tattoos.

Levine [which, coincidentally, happens to be the last name of my 7th grade history teacher] went on social media where he wrote many adjectives alongside an image of the "One Love" light display that was featured during the group's performance.

The singer explained hyperbolically to his fans [a word derived from "fanatic"] just how he claimed to feel about performing at the football game in which the New England Patriots beat the Los Angeles Rams 13 to 3, in a game that will go down in Super Bowl history as the 53rd Super Bowl Game.

"When we accepted the responsibility to perform at the SBHTS, I took out my pen and just wrote," Levine wrote  in the photo caption. "Some of the words that came to me in that moment eventually made their way onto the incredible lanterns that flew high and low tonight. We thank the universe for this historic opportunity to play on the world’s biggest stage. We thank our fans for making our dreams possible. And we thank our critics for always pushing us to do better. One Love."

He blathered on, "And the list of words is... [wait for it ...] Forgive, Laugh, Cry, Smile, Share, Live, Endure, Embrace, Remember, Enlighten, Preserve, Inspire, Sweat, Fight, Express, Give, Receive, Elevate, Climb, Unify, Fortify, Soften, Dance, Scream, Dream, Educate, Provide, Inhale, Exhale, Persevere, Stand, Kneel, Overcome, Love, Listen."

Some other words that come to mind: "Trump, America, great, make, wall, aliens, illegal, tremendous, drugs, big, stand, Mexico, China, Putin, Xi, CNN, incredible, unbelievable, fake, news, Mueller."

Maroon 5 received a ton of backlash leading up to the Super Bowl Halftime Show. This was largely due to self-described artists wielding their virtue by protesting the NFL over its treatment of Colin Kaepernick, the moron who made a name for himself by "taking a knee" thus disrespecting the national anthem of the United States of America and sucking as an NFL quarterback.

Levine said Friday of his band's decision to perform despite the calls to boycott, "No one thought about it more than I did. No one put more thought and love into this than I did. ... I spoke to many people, most importantly though, I silenced all the noise and listened to myself, and made my decision about how I felt."

Some of the words that Levine evidently forgot to add to his thoughtful list of words to describe how he felt:

money, money, money, more money, more money, even more money.

The NFL doesn't pay performers for the halftime show, but the notoriety will fill their coffers soon enough.

Adam Levine is a damn hero in my book of damn heroes and Maroon 5 has got his 6.


I hope you'll follow Brain Flushings and have a few laughs while you get a conservative viewpoint. Politics is the new NFL without the mindless kneeling and this blog will both inform you and hopefully entertain you bigly.

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