Hillary drops the "n" and feminists swoon

Unpresidented Hillary Clinton may be preparing for 2020, according to my source, Vinny Boombots. 

In an unprecedented move, Hillary allegedly plans to legally remove the 'n's from her last name. She believes it will help increase her approval rating among feminists who didn't vote for her in 2016's presidential election, an election she lost to TV personality and real estate mogul, Donald J. Trump.

The main reason for Hillary not scoring with that demographic is due to her not being "feminine enough" says renowned feminist Ruth Bader Ginsburg between naps. 

"If she went ahead and changed her last name to Clito, that would be an extreme advanta . . . zzz."

In a recent graduation ceremony at her alma mater, Wellesley, Hillary recalled how the election was stolen from her, particularly by Russia, James Comey and those "deplorables from those damn red states. You know, those states that aren't sophisticated and cling to their Bibles."

She went on: "They shouldn't allow those states to vote--those people are too dumb to vote and the proof is they voted for Trump instead of me."

According to Vinny, President Trump is praying that the Democratic Party will be stupid enough to put her up for POTUS in the next presidential race. He told Vinny (behind closed doors) that "Not only is Hillary crooked, she's also a loser, like ISIS. They're filled with losers and she's a loser too. Losers. Hillary and ISIS are nothing but losers."

Rumor also has it that Hillary is planning to go after Google legally for publishing her real age. She knows that will hurt her in 2020 when she turns 73 as that would make her the oldest president if she wins. It would also make her the first president who would allow babies to be killed in a full-term pregnancy.

"I never told them how old I am and they have no right to publish my age without my permission," she said in a stern monotone. "How did they find out? Did they 'Google' me?"

But the chances of Hillary winning the next presidential election are about the same as Chelsea Manning getting to play the starring role in "Rambo and the Return of the Doo-Rag Generation."



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