Israeli tank, Model LMAO, captured by Hamas

Hamas has proudly captured an Israeli tank, displaying it last week at a memorial service for seven Hamas scumcrumpets who were killed by a failed attempt at tunnel engineering. The idiots were trying to dig illegal tunnels in Gaza when it collapsed on them. 

No Jewish people were hurt in the accident.

The tank, Model LMAO, is made of wood and has rubber wheels, making it desert incompatible, but who cares? The darn thing looks scary and goes zip.

"I attended the funeral for the fallen Hamas heroes," Mohammad bin Ali Abu bin Omar bin Kazan, a Palestinian said, "and was prepared to be all sad and stuff until the tank rolled by. There were guys on it in Hamas military gear and all, and my heart just went, like all 'Allahu akbar.'" 

The olive drab tank, designed to match the olive drab sand of some desert somewhere, but not in any Middle East desert, sported Walmart brand Douglas All-Season tires (at only $59 each),  3 inch thick wooden armor plating, and a hollowed out Demarini baseball bat turret.

Not many people believed that Hamas captured an Israeli tank and Israel doesn't believe it either, as none were reported missing. But if it gets memorial service attendees to chuckle off to Buffalo, what's the harm, eh?

Rumor has it that Hamas is in the process of developing night-vision goggles that look remarkably like 3-D movie glasses.



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