Wall Street es Occupado

Michael Mierda prior to interview

Well, they're still out there, just a marchin' and a blowin' in the wind. Kumbayah. Who are these young people who want their student loans paid off  and other free stuff? Let's find out.
  
In an interview with 24 year old Michael Mierda, I had the chance to ask some pointed questions. His answers should illuminate any questions you might have had about the commitment and intelligence of these rabid protestors.

Me: Can you tell me what you and the other protestors are out here to protest? 


Mierda: Like the beginning is near, man. We are everywhere throughout the nation. I was like, you know, forget about it. The system's gotta go. My freakin' college loan's gotta go. Close the banks, stop the wars, give us jobs, man. Capitalism sucks and it's time to tax the millionaires and billionaires, and maybe even some of the thousandaires. Share the wealth, man.


Me: Are you currently working?


Mierda: Me work? No way, man. Like I'm not gonna work for a bunch of corrupt fat cats. If I work, I'll be payin' more in taxes than they do. It isn't fair, man. 


Me: Actually, the rich pay significantly more taxes than the poor. The top one percent pay ten percent of the taxes, and the top ten percent, pay something like forty percent of the taxes. Where did you learn that you would have to pay more in taxes than the rich?


Mierda: What are you, some kinda tea party dude? Everyone knows it's true. The guy handing out this newspaper said so, and that's good enough for me. There are no good jobs either, man. Like what's Wall Street doin' about that?

Surprised? Check out their rooms

Me: Well, I'm not sure Wall Street has anything to do with that problem, but do you see any connection to the jobs problem and President Obama and his fiscal policies?

Mierda: It's like the power brokers, man. They're the ones with the power and the money and they're makin' us all go broke--maybe that's why they're called power brokers (he then laughs so hard a bubble of mucous emerges from his left nostril). You know, man, this is a revolution. Occupy Wall Street began on September 17th and we're like goin' strong, man. We are like those Tahrir Square guys and stuff, and we will put an end to corruption and capitalism. We are, like, you know, gonna take back this country, man.


Me: How are you going to take it back?


Mierda: We're workin' on that, man. We'll have it all figured out and when we do, we're all gonna be the same and equal.


At that point, his mucous bubble burst, and so did the bubble of my belief that these people actually had a clue as to why they were here. I came to realize that what they were really protesting was the success of their parents.

Moore and date at Capitalism Party-really man

I guess you could sum up what is going on with the Occupy Wall Street movement in one word: hypocrisy. There are celebrities, like Michael-Pass-the-Ketchup-Moore, who have made their fortunes through our  good old capitalist system. But Moore is more despicable than most because denouncing capitalism is precisely how he made his fortune. He reminds me of the '60's folk singers whose songs about poverty, war, and the system, is what made many of them wealthy-- Bob Dylan and Joan Baez come to mind. So the only thing besides anarchy that I can tell is blowin' in the wind, is the sour odor wafting along Wall Street and a silent message: take a shower, people.

Guess what the "S" stands for

Michael Moore and the rest of the leftists parasites who make their money from people like these protestors (and then jump on their anti-capitalist bandwagons pretending to actually care about their plight), will go on to feed off the meager earnings of these liberal robots--which brings to mind the words of an old folk song Where Have All the Flowers Gone "When will they ever learn, when will they ever learn?"




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