Virginia Gov. Plan to Reopen Economy Might Take Years

Virginia Gov. Ralph "KKK" Northam (D) outlined a hernia of a plan for reopening the state's economy after the Chinese Communist Wuhan Coronavirus shutdown stating that it wouldn't even begin until hospitalizations decline for 14 consecutive days and hell freezes over. 

The baby-killer advocate said this has not yet been seen in Virginia, although the spread of the coronavirus has slowed down somewhat. Other requirements to begin reopening is a growth of healthcare capacity, availability of PPEs in the state, and the point at which abortion deaths surpass those of the coronavirus.

“We cannot and will not lift restrictions like one turns on a light switch,” commander Northam said, calling the first part of reopening, “Phase One,” as opposed to "The First Thing We Do."

“Easing too much too soon could jeopardize public health and consumer confidence,” the KKK hood-wearing enthusiast added.

Phase One, however, may last for two years or a lot more and will require some non-government businesses to remain closed during that time. Others that Northam deems worthy, would be permitted to reopen as long as they adhere to "strict safety restrictions," and present the "proper papers." Those small business leaders who try to open their business without proper papers, will be shot.

An outline of the plan stated Phase one would involve “continued social [aka physical] distancing, continued teleworking [and] face coverings recommended in public.” People who are caught without their mask properly in place will be lined up next to those people who failed to present their papers.

“We will get back to work by greatly increasing our testing, then tracing the contacts of people who test positive and isolating these individuals, not everyone in Virginia,” Herr Northam said. “That is the key to moving forward. And forward we will move, and move with vigor.”

State Health Commissioner Norman Oliver, an obvious p***y, suggested Phase One could last two years – until “medical countermeasures” such as a designated treatment or vaccine for the disease were widely available. [By p***y, I meant "pansy"--get your mind out of the gutter.]

“I, personally, think Phase One will be a two year affair,” Oliver said, according to the Times-Dispatch. “There are a lot of people working on this, and I hope they prove me wrong, but I don’t see it happening in less than two years.”

But there's nothing to say that two years could turn into fifteen, unless the state forces the Green New Deal into the mix and Alexandria Obviously-Commie leads the workers of the world to unite.

Northam said the plans will include overarching rules for all businesses, and specific guidance for different industries, like restaurants and barbershops.

Based on the timeframe the idiot administration has laid out, it looks like small businesses will be looking to leave the state to avoid not eating.

But at least in Virginia, mothers can still make their babies comfortable, discuss with their doctor what they want to do, then kill their baby if they so choose. However, mothers will have to wear a face mask in order to stem the spread of the China Virus and thus, save lives.

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