Alleged NY Port Authority bomber's family think it was a conspiracy

The family of New York Port Authority incompetent suicide bomber Akayed Ullah, were shocked when they saw photos of him lying on the ground after his pipe bomb merely fizzled and burned him. It was then they knew it was their jihadi lying there.

Ullah's father-in-law, Zulifikar Haider worried when Akayed missed his routing call to his wife in Bangladesh on Monday. And then he heard his own wife scream.

"Even in our worst nightmares, [such as the one he had where the world recognized Jerusalem as the capital of Israel], we could not have foreseen this," Haider, 62, said Wednesday night. This came after two days of questioning by Bangladesh's counterterrorism police.

But Haider thinks Ullah was caught up in a "conspiracy," and Alex Jones concurs. "Those sneaky petes are everywhere," Jones said, "and I believe he had no idea that someone placed that pipe bomb on his back. After all, he had everything to live for."

Jones was later taken to a mental institution for observation . . . just kidding.

"A person who keeps roza [religious fasting in Islam], reads the Quran and goes to mosque five times a day can't do such a heinous act," Haider said, unless they're ISIS fighters, al Qaeda, Taliban Al Shabaab, Hezbollah, Hamas, and every other Islamic extremist group, you freaking idiot.

Ullah's wife, Jannatul Ferdous Jui, hid behind a curtain the her family's Dhaka home, [lest men see her beauty, gather lust in their hearts and attempt an "Al Franken"] and told the assembled infidel media that her husband is "innocent," and begged reporters and local lawyers to get him justice.

Yes, somebody covertly place that pipe bomb on his back after he built it at the electronics store where he worked. Let's not believe our lying eyes, but believe the wife of the poor burnt 'victim' of this failed attempt at killing us.

Ullah is a 27-year-old Bangladesh native living in Brooklyn since 2011. He strapped a pipe bomb to himself using zip ties and tape, but it failed to detonate fully and merely burned him in places I will not mention.


He told prosecutors that he did it "for the Islamic State," and because he was angry "with America's Middle East policies." 

Ullah and Jui married in Bangladesh last year but she stayed there to finish college and give birth to their son, who is now 6 months old. Ullah had returned to Bangladesh three times since the marriage the Dhaka Tribune reported.

"I hoped my daughter would go to the United States, and my son-in-law would then help get my son over there," Haider said, referring to chain migration policies that would allow Ullah to get a family member into the US without having to wait. 

"I no longer want my daughter to go to America. I just want our son-in-law back." And once his sentence is over, he will have his wish.

Ullah faces life in prison where he will receive three Halal meals a day and access to a gym and cable TV.



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