If the shoe bomb was on Cook's foot

Dem. Sen. iPhones wife to ask where he left his glasses

In a strange twist of events Apple CEO Tim Cook has agreed to fully comply with FBI Director James Comey's request to create a "back door" into encrypted iPhone data. The change of heart comes after Cook's expensive home was hit by rocket and mortar fire by ISIS sleeper cells.

"We cannot sit on our hands when we have the ability to be one step ahead of these bas**rds," Cook said. He was most upset over the disappearance of his Middle Eastern personal cook, Muhammad bin Mahmoud bin Ali bin Omar bin Ben. Cook believes the cook may have been taken hostage.

Director Comey did not need to follow through with his promise that if Apple refused to comply with the original court order, he would take the matter to the highest court.

Republican presidential candidate Donald J. Trump had called for a boycott of Apple products and was relieved that he didn't need to follow through with the threat. 

Mr. Trump uses iPhones and other Apple products extensively. "Those losers are lucky they got bombed. If they didn't, I was ready to do it myself. Anyway, now we don't have to boycott those suckers," Trump told his audience of 23,000 screaming fans.

The purpose of the request was to hack into the encrypted phone of San Bernadino jihadist Syed Farook. He, along with his not very lovely wife, Tashfeen Malik, killed 14 people in the attack in the name of ISIS and the religion of peace.

At the time, Mr. Cook was totally unaffected and his concerns were centered around his company rather than the security of our country. Since the rocket and mortar attack that somehow made his personal chef disappear, he is singing a different iTune.




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