Nancy Pelosi lands in Taiwan but General Tso is Chicken

Well, House Speaker Nancy "Hands-a-Blur" Pelosi (D-CA) apparently landed in Taiwan after threatening President Xi that she was going to go ahead and do it. There was international speculation and threats of Chinese retaliation, especially coming from Xi and his right-hand General Tso, but it turns out they both were too chicken to shoot her plane out of the sky, which would likely have started a nuclear war if Biden wasn't the alleged President.

The aircraft, specially designed with an oversized bar and flashy nose, carried the Speaker without incident.

Screen grab from "Louder with Crowder"

At first it was feared that China would blow Pelosi out of the sky, but they ended up merely blowing hot air, and General Tso has completely lost face but will not be committing hari kari, [the ritual suicide of personal disembowelment due to being disgraced] because he is not Japanese.

The Speaker and hand-gesturer is on an expensive tour paid for by the sucker taxpayers in which she will visit many allied nations in Asia. She is the first Speaker of the House to visit Taiwan since Newt Gingrich did it in 1997. By doing this visit, she is giving legitimacy to Taiwan while really pissing off Xi and the entire Chinese Communist Party.

China has warned the US against such a visit weeks before Paul Pelosi, Nancy drinking buddy and husband, got a DUI in California and she subsequently decided to leave the country and take the heat off of "Paulie P" as he is known in certain circles. But alleged President Biden mumbled around that time that he didn't think it was "a good idea right now," however, he didn't say when it would be a good idea.

Meanwhile, Chinese President Xi Jinping, a guy with a perpetual smirk and a face you want to punch, phoned our so-called president on Thursday and told him that the U.S. must not "play with fire" regarding Taiwan.

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"Those who play with fire will perish by it. It is hoped that the US will be clear-eyed about this," a Chinese readout of the Biden-Xi call said.

When Biden heard the word 'Taiwan' and Nancy Pelosi in the same sentence, he thought President Xi was inviting Pelosi to party with him and 'tie one on'.

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